


The Play List [from a to z]

by kumjongin



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Biting, Blindfolds, Blood Kink, Body Worship, Crossdressing Kink, Double Penetration, Drug-Induced Sex, Exhibitionism, Food Kink, Friends to Lovers, Gags, Kinks, Knifeplay, M/M, Mirror Sex, Video Cameras
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-24
Updated: 2017-08-24
Packaged: 2018-12-19 13:39:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 40,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11898897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kumjongin/pseuds/kumjongin
Summary: In which Sehun and Jongin decide to work their way through an alphabetical list of kinks and sexual explorations.





	1. Autagonistophilia - in front of a camera

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: exhibitionism, cameras, dubious consent to the cameras

Sehun glanced up toward the door of his dorm room at the sound of Jongin's familiar knock. The door was already open, Sehun's roommate having not bothered to shut it as he escaped down the hall to the bathroom. “Hey,” he greeted the other male, his presence not uncommon or unwelcome in the room.

“Yo,” Jongin acknowledged and stepped away from the door, making his way to flop onto Sehun's bed. “I'm bored,” he complained.

An eye roll accompanied the words, knowing that Jongin was almost always complaining about being bored. “Don't you have...oh, I don't know, homework?” he teased, typing away at the essay that was due the following afternoon.

A scowl fell onto Jongin's face, “Not what I meant.”

Sehun glanced up at the other, “I'm not giving you a blowjob, if that's what you're after.” It wouldn't be uncommon for Jongin to ask that of him, they were simply friends but there had been something of an agreement between them since high school that they were also more than willing to help one another out once in a while. Though sometimes it was far more frequent than that.

Jongin snorted, “That's lame. But okay. I had an idea anyway,” he began, leaning up from the foot of the bed to grab the hackey sack that was on the dresser between the beds.

The younger knew when Jongin was fishing for encouragement to tell him the brilliant idea he had. Sehun was well aware of his tactics, but decided to amuse him for now. “What idea?” he asked, still working on his laptop instead of giving the other his attention.

Tossing the sack into the air, Jongin began a rhythm of playing catch with himself. “Pay attention to me,” he complained with a half-laugh. “No, like, I was thinking. Neither of us have a girlfriend or anything, right?”

Sehun finally looked up from the laptop, a look of skepticism clear on his face. “Well I'm gay and you're still recovering from that one chick, so yeah that's probably a safe assumption,” he snorted. Jongin was easily more than bi-curious as well, but he knew that was an argument for a different time.

“Whatever, it was rhetorical.”

“This isn't a really weird way of asking me out, is it?” the younger cut in before Jongin could explain. They'd briefly toyed with the idea of dating before, but had quickly decided that it was better as just friends.

A soft laugh escaped him, making the sack fall onto his lap instead of his hand. “No. But I was reading about some things, and I think we should do them,” he said vaguely.

A frown accompanied these words. “'Some things?' Like what? We aren't going to rob someone, are we?”

Jongin swatted Sehun on the knee, “Here, I made a list,” he informed him, leaning toward Sehun in order to slip a piece of paper from his jeans pocket.

“You're being weirder than usual. This isn't like a dying wish list, right?”

“You watch too many chick flicks.”

Sehun snorted before opening the list, a brow lifting as he skimmed the contents. It wasn't unlike Jongin to have some strange ideas, but usually nothing like this. “A kink list? Are you kidding me? Why would I go along with this?”

“Because you love me. And you can deny it all you want, but I know you're as kinky as I am,” Jongin answered with a shrug, taking back the list from Sehun's fingers.

At that moment, Joonmyun decided to walk in, brushing past Jongin in order to go to his desk, searching for something. “Uh, dude, you okay?” Sehun brushed his conversation with Jongin aside for the moment to look after his roommate.

“Fine, fine, I have to find my notes for my abnormal psych test in an hour,” he said, still digging through his things.

“Well, Jongin is a walking example of abnormal psych, take him,” he joked.

The aforementioned boy snorted, but hopped up from the bed. “Good luck, bro. By the way, Sehun and I need the room tomorrow night, so make yourself scarce. Bye,” he waved behind him.

Sehun stared after him for a silent moment before glancing toward Joonmyun. The older boy raised a brow. “Oh. I didn't know it was like that for you two. But okay, I'll go stay with my girlfriend tomorrow,” he shrugged, not seeming overly fazed by what had happened. Sehun, on the other hand, groaned.

 

-

 

The following evening, as promised, Joonmyun made himself scarce. Too many plans had been made without Sehun's real agreement, but it wasn't as though he was actually opposed to it either. It had been a while since he'd hooked up with anyone, so that tended to make him far more agreeable than usual. Unfortunately, he hadn't paid close enough attention to the list – having thought that he'd just wave it away – to actually recall what had been first on the list in the first place. So when Jongin knocked on the door, the younger opened the door with a slight bit of apprehension. “Hey,” he greeted in the usual, casual manner.

“Hey, yourself,” Jongin smiled and slid by. “So? Have you changed your mind?”

“You didn't exactly give me a chance to even agree,” he reminded him.

The elder shrugged, “But I see you still made sure Joonmyun's gone.”

“You made sure of that.”

“Whatever. Are you going to argue?”

Sehun rolled his eyes, but didn't disagree. “What's first on the list, anyway?”

“Is that an agreement?” Jongin asked, a playful smirk adorning his face.

The younger never liked admitting how weak he tended to be for the other male, especially when he batted his eyes a certain way or pursed his lips just perfectly. It drove him a bit crazy, but Jongin was all too aware of his effect much of the time for Sehun to ever admit it. “Yeah, whatever, fine.”

Jongin let a hand drift to cup Sehun's cheek, the slight smirk still in place. “You know it will be fun, so stop trying to pretend like you aren't excited,” he suggested, his voice taking on a raspy sort of tone that sent a chill down the younger's spine. But instead of anticipating a response, Jongin merely let his hand fall and went over to flip up the lid of Sehun's laptop. “First up – I don't want to pronounce it, but it starts with an A and basically, we're filming it. It was either being onstage or film it, I figured for a start that this might be easier,” he explained, heading to Sehun's webcam.

“Seriously? You aren't going to, like, put it on a website or anything though, right?” he asked, feeling a twinge of both nerves and excitement at the prospect.

Instead of answering, however, Jongin merely shushed the other and pressed the record button. “It'll be fine,” he assured him.

Of course, the younger realized that this wasn't a promise either way, but he hoped that he'd get to mention it later on. And as Jongin walked over toward the bed again that Sehun was perched on, the familiar sensation of anticipation bubbled in his stomach. Jongin reached forward, tilting Sehun's chin upward before leaning in to press his lips against the other's.

The sensation was familiar, of course, having kissed Jongin many times before. But the added knowledge of the camera being on him made it a different sensation, feeling so much more exposed and therefor so much more exciting. Jongin's lips pressed insistently against his own, toying and playful. At the sensation of the elder's tongue pressing against the crease of his lips, he parted them to invite the other inside his mouth. A quiet groan sounded in the back of his throat as Jongin licked inside his mouth, tilting his head more to deepen the sensation. But after what only seemed like a few moments, Jongin pulled away, that cursed smirk adorning his face once again.

“Strip,” he commanded, stepping away from the view of the camera, gaze heavy on Sehun.

The younger swallowed. There was something that he always found so attractive about when Jongin would tell him what to do, and now proved no different. But the added pressure of the camera made him feel slightly more nervous than he normally would, knowing that his hesitation and body would be on full display. But when he caught sight of Jongin lifting a brow at his pause, he stood from the bed and obediently lifted his shirt up and pulled it off. Sehun was far more shy about his body than Jongin happened to be. It wasn't that he had a bad body, he was just rather thin and more soft than his friend was. Tossing his shirt onto the carpet, his hands went to undo his pants as well.

“Face the camera,” Jongin commanded, his voice raspy and deep.

Another shiver ran down Sehun's spine at the sound, but he did as he was told, his gaze connecting with the computer, the screen enabling him to see himself. It was strange, but the thought of he and Jongin doing far more lewd things in mere moments made the entire thing more exciting. Once the remainder of his clothing was off, he looked back toward Jongin, almost surprised that he was undressed as well, but realized he must have done so when he was enthralled in his own thoughts.

“You're beautiful,” Jongin whispered, taking a few steps toward Sehun and closing the distance, kissing him quickly.

The compliment from the other brought a slight smile to the younger's face, never expecting the rare moments when Jongin would bestow him with praise. It wasn't that Jongin was ever cruel to him or anything of the sort, but he usually didn't show much of a soft side either, especially when it was in a situation where it could be documented.

With a glance toward the camera's positioning, he pushed Jongin slightly, urging him to sit on the edge of the bed. The elder did so without a word, and Sehun slipped down to his knees. A hand reached out, stroking Jongin slowly to hardness. A quiet moan left the elder's lips at the sensation, encouraging Sehun to lean forward and kiss the tip of his cock. Moving his hand, Sehun swirled his tongue around the head of his length, eliciting a low sound in the back of Jongin's throat. Letting his length slip into his mouth, the younger slowly took him into his mouth. A hand came to rest in his hair, fingers pulling just slightly. Setting up a rhythm of bobbing along the other's length, Sehun knew that he wanted to make it a decent show for the camera, and judging by the sounds that came in a fairly steady stream from Jongin's mouth, he seemed to be doing a satisfactory job.

“Oh god, baby, stop,” came the voice above him, Jongin pushing lightly on his shoulder as though he both wanted him to continue and wanted him to follow his words.

But knowing that something better was soon to come, Sehun did as he was asked, and pulled away, swiping at his mouth. Normally Sehun wasn't so obedient or submissive, but there was something about the camera being on them that made him want to just follow along with what was asked of him. The thought of Jongin having this power over him, of being able to see that on camera, was enough to make his cock twitch.

The elder stood, nudging Sehun onto the bed as he went to grab the condom and lubricant from his jeans pocket. The younger did so, placing himself on all fours on the bed, waiting for Jongin to return to him.

The dip in the bed alerted him of such, and Sehun could feel a shiver go down his spine as Jongin pressed a kiss to his spine. He could hear the sound of the lubricant being opened, and Sehun wondered briefly if he was spreading it into his fingers or onto his length. He didn't have to wonder for long, however, when he felt the tip of Jongin's length against his opening. A quiet sound left him at the anticipation of being filled, and in a forceful thrust Jongin entered him.

“Oh, fuck, you could be more gentle, you ass,” Sehun hissed, the sudden intrusion causing his eyes to water. It wasn't entirely unpleasant, but he definitely wished that he'd been given more warning and preparation.

“Shut up,” Jongin said and swatted him on the hip. Even so, he gave Sehun a moment to adjust to the feeling of being so filled, halting any movements until he gave the go ahead.

Peering over at the camera, Sehun could see their position on the screen, the sight making his length twitch again. “Fuck me,” he said, though it came out more as a plea than anything, arching his back into the feeling of Jongin inside of him.

“That's more like it,” the elder muttered, though before Sehun could ask him what that meant, he was distracted by Jongin beginning to thrust inside of him, shallowly at first. The fingers clutching into his hip gave way that he was restraining far more than he wanted to, but the younger appreciated the slow increase in feeling.

But that didn't last long, as soon he was pushing back into the feeling, wanting more. Jongin complied, pulling back almost completely before thrusting back in, setting up a deep rhythm that made Sehun's arms feel weak. A string of moans left his lips at the relentless sensations filling him. After moments, the younger was unable to hold himself up, and let himself kneel on his elbows instead, letting Jongin control the rhythm.

Above him, he could hear Jongin letting out a mumble of curses, his hips speeding up and becoming more erratic. “Touch yourself,” came the next command, a harsh broken whisper into his skin as Jongin leaned down and kissed along his spine.

With a quiet moan, Sehun reached for his own cock, stroking himself slowly which contrasted sharply with the quick rhythm Jongin was still setting. But the sensations were proving to be nearly overwhelming, and he could feel the tell-tale signs of his climax approaching. A tingling in his stomach and an all-over warmth gave way before his release came, going over his hand and the sheets below them.

Jongin, however, wasn't quite finished, and continued to thrust into Sehun's overly sensitive body until he could feel him pause, tense, and the signature almost-growl that told of his own climax. Moments passed afterword, both of them trying to recover from their orgasms.

“Get the fuck off of me,” Sehun finally hissed, though the sharpness of the words was dulled by the near-laugh in his voice.

With a groan, Jongin slipped out of him, Sehun hissing at the sudden emptiness, and stood to throw away the condom and slip over to the computer.

“Well? Was it that bad?” he asked, bringing tissues over to Sehun on the bed.

“Shut up. This was fine, but I can't say the same for whatever else is on your list,” he said, laying on his side and swiping up the mess.

“You'll enjoy it,” Jongin promised before crawling in next to him, pressing kisses along Sehun's sweaty shoulder.

 

-

 

The next morning, in Sehun's literature class, he was the subject of a few strange looks that he couldn't identify. It was only when one of the more annoying kids in the class, someone by the name of Jongdae, approached him after the hour with a strange smile on his face.

“Hey, Sehun,” he said.

“Uh, hi?” a frown adorned Sehun's face, unsure why the other was bothering to talk to him when he hadn't all semester.

“Nice performance last night,” Jongdae let out a laugh before waving and walking away.

Sehun sat still for a moment, praying that this was about anything else. But when he saw Jongin later, the elder boy held a certain smile that spoke volumes. “You didn't,” Sehun accused before saying anything else.

“It was a big hit,” Jongin shrugged.

“Jesus. How? You used my computer.”

“You weren't paying close enough attention.” His friend smiled, placed a kiss to Sehun's cheek, and walked away. “Let's do the next one next week?”


	2. Blindfolds and Body Worship

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: rimming, light roughness

The following week was met with a hoard of strange looks from too many people having been made aware of Sehun and Jongin's little performance for the camera. Considering Sehun tended to be rather private about the goings-on in his life, it was a lot more attention than he wanted, but he also knew it was rather pointless to argue against it or avoid contact with everyone who had witnessed the spectacle Jongin, on the other hand, was more dismayed at the fact that people had started to assume that either he was gay or that he and Sehun meant more to each other than they actually were, so he'd been trying to dissuade everyone from that by informing people that it was just for fun. But Jongin wasn't the type to be shy about any and all kinds of attention.

Sehun only saw glimpses of his friend that week, being too annoyed to want to be around him much. But in the middle of Sehun having coffee, Jongin plopped down in the seat across from him with that usual easy smile. “Hey, stranger,” he joked, swiping Sehun's cup to take a sip of the sweetened beverage.

“What do you want?” the younger asked, though there wasn't much sting in his words. Truthfully, he had missed seeing the other around as much as usual.

“You can't still be mad,” he said easily, handing back the cup.

“Whatever, it's over,” Sehun offered a shrug.

“Good. So are we on for tonight?” the tilt of Jongin's head spoke of an innocence far beyond the truth.

A sigh escaped the younger. “You're still intent on going through with this?”

“Unless you're backing out, yeah. But if you do, you're a pussy.”

“Shut up. Yeah, fine. But this time, we're going to your room. And no cameras,” a slight smile cracked his attempt at a stony facade.

Jongin let out a quiet laugh. “Okay, fine. Being in my room will make it easier anyway,” he shrugged and stood from the table. “Come over at, like, midnight.”

“What the fuck?”

“I have plans before then,” he grinned and reached out to ruffle the younger's hair before leaving the campus cafe.

-

At just around midnight, Sehun stepped out of his room to head down the hallway to Jongin's, still unsure about why he wanted to continue on this strange list. Though he might never actually admit it aloud, he knew that it was because the thrill of it all had been exciting. The idea of being watched and being on display, of having people see him submit was too intoxicating.

With a light tap on the door, Jongin opened with his usual signature smile. “You came, I wasn't sure if you would,” he said before stepping to the side for Sehun to enter.

“Eh, I'm not that mad anymore. What's the B for tonight?” he asked, surveying the state of casual chaos that was Jongin's room. His friend's side held posters of the usual college cliches, with half-dressed women and comic book figures to create a strange mix that was simply Jongin. The other side of the room belonged to Jongin's roommate, a quiet boy named Kyungsoo, and was sparsely decorated, though very neatly maintained. “Where's your roommate?”

“Don't know, don't care. Told him to get lost for the night,” Jongin shrugged, rummaging in one of the drawers for something unknown.

“You have such people skills,” Sehun laughed, “But that doesn't answer my first question.”

Standing again, Jongin held something between his hands, a silky black strip of fabric. “B is for blindfolds. And body worship,” he said simply.

The words sent a tingle through Sehun's stomach, though a slight frown took over his expression. “Body worship? What even is that?” he asked, watching the slightly older boy closely.

“Think about it for a minute. What's part of you that I love?” Jongin asked playfully, taking a few steps closer to Sehun.

The words froze Sehun for a moment. “Um...”

A smirk took over Jongin's face. “Definitely not your speaking skills. Think about it,” he whispered, hands going to Sehun's hips.

“Um...my ass?” he asked, though a slight laugh accompanied the words. He knew that the older boy tended to pay particular attention to his bottom, often swatting it in a playful manner and paying particular attention to it when in moments of intimacy, sometimes even referring to him as “bubble butt.”

“Exactly,” Jongin confirmed, leaning forward to kiss the younger softly.

Sehun sighed softly into the kiss, reveling in the feeling of the other's soft lips moving against his own. The elder's hands slipped from his hips along to cup his ass, pulling him closer as he deepened the kiss. Winding his arms around Jongin's neck, Sehun parted his lips and swiped his tongue along Jongin's lips, feeling a sense of urgency in wanting the other boy.

Jongin curled his tongue around Sehun's, toying with him playfully as his fingers massaged his ass through the tight denim. The younger emitted a quiet moan in to the other's mouth at the sensations, but was quickly disappointed when Jongin pulled away from him altogether.  
“Come on, let's slip this on,” he suggested, the silk draped over his fingers.

Sehun had nearly forgotten about that, but simply gave a slight nod. Jongin slipped the cool fabric over his eyes, and the younger could feel his shoulders tense slightly at the sudden inability to see.

“How does it feel?” Jongin asked, his voice quiet, fingers slipping underneath Sehun's t-shirt to toy lightly with the soft skin of his stomach.

His muscles contracted at the cool sensation of the other's fingers. “Weird,” he offered a quiet chuckle.

The other didn't answer him, but instead Sehun could feel Jongin's fingers take hold of his shirt and lift it up, and Sehun realized that with the addition of the blindfold, he would have to put his trust in Jongin. Lifting his arms, he allowed the elder to slip the garment off of him, and could detect the soft plop of fabric hitting the floor.

Hot breath fanned over his collarbones, sending a chill down his spine before he felt Jongin's lips pressing a kiss to his neck. “Jongin,” Sehun whispered, reaching out to pull the other closer to him. Soft lips continued to move sensually against his neck and collarbones.

However, the sensations didn't last as long as Sehun may have hoped for when Jongin pulled away. Not knowing his exact location in the room, he could only stand still and wait on the other boy to do something, or instruct him to go somewhere. It wasn't too long before Jongin's fingers returned to his torso, trailing down to the button of his jeans to undo them.

Though he knew it was a game Jongin was playing with him, he couldn't help but want to nudge him into going a little faster than the painfully slow way that he pulled the zipper down. “You're such a tease,” Sehun complained, his voice a whisper in the silence of the room. There were distant sounds he could pick up on, of those in other rooms watching TV and talking with their friends in muffled voices. A quiet chuckle accompanied the words, but Jongin seemed to relinquish a bit of the control he was exerting and slipped his fingers into the waistband of Sehun's pants to slide them down. Carefully, the younger stepped out of the clothing, trying to ensure that he wouldn't bump into anything with his inability to see.

After he was naked, the cool air in the room raising light goosebumps on his pale flesh, Jongin nudged him toward the bed and told him to get on all fours. With a bit of careful maneuvering, Sehun managed to make it onto the bed, and did as Jongin asked. It was reminiscent of just the past week, only this time the younger was unable to see, and this time Jongin didn't seem as intent to simply fuck him.

The dip in the bed told him of Jongin joining him on the bed, but before he could ask him what he planned on doing, there was a sharp smack placed on the cheek of his ass. A surprised yelp escaped his mouth at the feeling, and he could hear a faint sound as though the elder was trying not to laugh.

Instead of another smack, however, like he had expected, he suddenly felt a soft kiss placed to the sensitive area. He realized that he actually didn't know what to expect from all of this, as he had the last week. A few more kisses were peppered along the cheek of his ass, while Jongin lightly kneaded the area. Quiet sounds left Sehun's throat at the sensations, far more subtle than he was used to from Jongin and far more sensual as opposed to outright sexual, but he liked this other side of his friend.

Just when Sehun was relaxing under the sensations, Jongin pulled away and another sharp smack fell upon his skin. Though normally the younger wouldn't exactly think of himself as turned on by spanking, he found that the feeling sent a twitch through his cock. Another few smacks, and Sehun could imagine that the skin of his ass was red with the assault that it wasn't used to, but he found himself getting hard from the sensations as well.

But when the spanking stopped, Sehun ended up pushing back slightly toward Jongin to want more. “Relax,” Jongin said quietly, running a hand along the other's spine.

A low whining sound emitted from him, but he knew it would be rather pointless to argue against him when clearly the elder was the one with the upper hand. However, when the younger suddenly felt a tongue sliding along the crack of his ass, his fingers dug into the bed below him, trying not to tense too much. “What are you doing?” he couldn't resist asking, his voice sounding scratchier than he expected it to.

But instead of getting an answer, Jongin merely swatted him again before running his hand along Sehun's spine, gently nudging him to lower his torso. The younger suspected what was coming, of course, but did as he was beckoned and rested on his forearms, his ass in the air and feeling rather exposed by the position.

As he'd thought, the elder's hands soon moved to spread the cheeks of his ass apart, and a soft, warm tongue gently pressed against his opening. “Fuck,” Sehun quietly uttered, his length feeling almost painfully hard at the sudden arousal that dawned with the new sensation.

Lapping at the area teasingly, Jongin's hands continued to massage his skin, attempting to keep him relaxed before he slipped his tongue inside. A low groan emitted from the younger as he did so, and he could only push back slightly to try and get more of the feeling. But the elder was never one to take orders very well, and his hands kept Sehun from being able to do much. Thankfully for the younger, Jongin continued his ministrations and set up a slow rhythm of tongue-fucking the other.

At this point, little whines were coming from Sehun's mouth in a broken stream. While continuing the motions inside of him, one of Jongin's hands slipped from his hip in order to wrap his long fingers around Sehun's length.

Having not gotten much satisfaction in that manner yet, the younger let out a moan that was likely too loud for their surroundings, but he didn't much care. The dual sensations enabled that he didn't last very long, and it was only a few thrusts and tugs later that he hit his climax, a stream of unintelligible sounds and words coming from his mouth.

He hardly noticed that Jongin moved away as he was recovering, and was only made fully aware of it when there were fingers suddenly removing the blindfold. Though the room was reasonable dark by objective standards, the younger had gotten used to the darkness and had to blink a few times to try and get used to the sudden infiltration of light.

“Well?” Jongin suddenly spoke, playfully pushing Sehun over onto the bed.

“Shut up,” he whined, not wanting to give the other the satisfaction of feeding his ego.

The elder snorted, but swiped at the come that had leaked onto his blanket.

“Next time, you're the one that's going to be subject to the kink, okay?” the younger sighed, reaching for Jongin to join him on the bed.

The elder complied, wrapping an arm around Sehun's waist. “Don't worry, the next one is for both of us.”

Sehun couldn't be bothered to try and figure out what the hell that could mean.


	3. Claustrophilia - tight spaces

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: not for anyone with claustrophobia for obvious reasons

The next week passed with far fewer strange looks, though Sehun still caught the odd joke directed his way. However, it was only when Chanyeol approached him that he learned it went a bit further than just being unknowingly filmed. Chanyeol was a friend of Jongin's mostly, as they tended to have a similar way of handling their lives. Both tended to focus simply on how they would get their enjoyment for the moment, and anything that was more than that was pushed to the back-burner.

So when the elder approached Sehun, his usual wide smile adorning his face, the younger was immediately suspicious. It wasn't that he and Chanyeol didn't get along, only that normally their conversations happened when Jongin was there as well. Not to mention that Sehun was a bit more on edge lately anyway.

“What do you want?” he asked quietly before retraining his gaze on the open book before him.

“Nothing. Just curious about something,” Chanyeol had a tendency to speak too loudly for most situations, and now was no different.

Sehun frowned, but slipped the book shut and finally looked at the other. “What?”

“You and Jongin...” he began.

“Ugh. Not this. Don't bring up the video. And no, we aren't dating,” he rattled off before Chanyeol could finish his thought.

A loud laugh followed the words before the other shook his head. “No, nothing like that. Jongin's told me all about it. I was just curious about you. See, I know Jongin is into anything and he's a weird dude, but I always thought you were so normal,” he explained, his expression painted with amusement.

Sehun wasn't sure if he was more irritated at the fact that Jongin was telling people about it or that Chanyeol thought it was any of his business. “I guess you were wrong,” he mumbled, though a thought occurred to him, “What all did he tell you anyway?”

Chanyeol shrugged. “Well, I mean everyone saw the video,” he grinned, “but he also told me about last week. And that you agreed to do whatever he wanted for the next...what? Twenty-four weeks?”

“Shut up. Yeah, I didn't see the harm. And 24 is a little kind, it'll probably take longer if you factor in finals and breaks,” he shrugged, trying to stifle his own embarrassment.

But the older boy didn't seem to mind all that much that Sehun wasn't being all that friendly, “Whatever. I just find it amusing. I guess the whole 'watch out for the quiet ones' thing is accurate,” he laughed again.

“Is there a point to any of this, or are you just here to annoy me?”

“No point, really. I was killing time between classes. Oh, and Jongin told me to tell you to meet him in front of the science building tonight,” he said casually, popping up from his seat.

“Why didn't he just text me that?”

“Because he's an idiot and forgot his phone at Luhan's the other night,” Chanyeol shook his head before leaving.

-

That night, after Sehun was finished with his school work, he made his way to the science building as he was asked. Jongin was standing against the wall, looking gorgeous as he usually seemed to. A smile adorned his face when he saw Sehun approach. “You came. I wasn't sure if Chanyeol was actually going to tell you or not,” he laughed.

“Yeah, unfortunately. Why are you telling him about what we're doing anyway?”

Jongin tilted his head just slightly, dark hair falling into his eyes perfectly. “I didn't think it was a big deal.”

“It's not, but it's just a little awkward. How did you lose your phone?”

“Correction, I didn't lose it. I forgot it. Because I got way too drunk and passed out in Luhan's bed. But he was heading home for a long weekend or something, so I have to wait until Monday to get it back,” Jongin shrugged.

“You're an idiot,” Sehun rolled his eyes. “What did you want? And why here?”

“It's night C,” Jongin said with another smile. “And because what we need is in here. Come on,” he reached out and took Sehun's hand.

“You know, it would be nice if you actually...I don't know, asked me instead of just saying 'we're fucking tonight, let's go,'” Sehun pointed out, though followed behind anyway.

“Ooh, someone's bitchy today. I guess you aren't going to be as submissive as the last couple of times?” he snorted.

“Shut up. What's tonight, then?” even though he often tended to give a lot of attitude toward the other, there was a sort of understanding between them when Sehun was actually upset and when he was just being, well, himself.

“Claustrophilia,” Jongin said, before leading him toward the end of the hallway.

“Uh, small spaces? Where do you even get these ideas?”

“Internet, where anyone finds anything these days,” he smiled. “Here, janitor's closet.”

“This is going to be gross,” Sehun complained, but when Jongin unlocked the door, he followed him. “How did you get the key?”

“Funny thing about that, the janitor really shouldn't leave his keys laying around.”

Sehun snorted, but when Jongin nudged the small of his back to enter, he complied and slipped inside the small space. There wasn't much room to stand, much less for anyone else to join him. The shelves were stocked with supplies and a mop dug into his back when he turned around to face Jongin. The older slipped in as well, shutting the door behind him. The darkness fell over the tight space, the only sound being the quiet rhythm of their breathing.

“How do you feel?” Jongin asked in a near-whisper, his hands coming to rest on Sehun's sides.

The space was so small that they were flush against one another, so Sehun let his hands trail up along Jongin's torso in order to wind his arms around the other's neck. “Kind of weird. I can't see you. And it smells like bleach in here,” Sehun let out a quiet laugh.

“I don't think we can actually fuck in here,” Jongin mumbled before leaning in to press soft kisses against the younger's lips. “But we can still make out in here,” he suggested.

The words caused Jongin's hot breath to fan over his lips, and Sehun didn't bother with a response before tilting his head in order to draw Jongin into a kiss.

Their lips moved against one another softly, soft mouths kneading against each other with a slow desire. The space provided that they were pressed together much more than normal, that everything was surrounded by only their presence. Sehun had a moment of wondering if he'd ever felt quite so close to the other. Normally, their moments of intimacy were flush with the need of getting to something faster, and wanting to simply get a release from being together.

This was different. It was filled with soft touches and no sense of urgency in the way that Jongin kissed him. Usually it would move quickly to teeth and tongues as a prelude to something more. But the elder merely continued to press soft kisses against his mouth. A quiet sigh escaped the younger's lips before pulling the other closer, deepening the kiss.

Jongin's tongue slipped out slightly to swipe slowly, teasingly against Sehun's bottom lip. The sensation caused a soft moan to escape the younger, his senses heightened at the inability to see and the feeling of Jongin being all around him. The elder pulled Sehun's bottom lip between his own, sucking on it slightly before giving it a gentle tug with his teeth.

The sensual actions caused a twitch in Sehun's pants, and he knew that with their proximity that Jongin would be able to feel it as well. But it didn't matter, and Sehun only pulled Jongin closer. Releasing Sehun's lip, the elder's tongue darted out to run along his mouth. The younger parted his lips, his own tongue slipping out as well to meet the other's.

A quiet groan escaped Jongin's throat as Sehun caressed his tongue, their pace slow and unhurried. Suddenly the elder's hands slipped down the younger's torso, trailing down along his hips and pulled their hips closer together. Sehun broke the kiss in a gasp, not having expected the feeling of Jongin's bulge against his own. Having been so focused on his own arousal at a simple kiss, he only noticed once they were pressed against each other what an effect it had on the other as well.

A whisper of Jongin's name sounded in the closet as the mentioned began to slowly grind against his hips. They hadn't done this particular act since high school, and the feeling of nostalgia and pure arousal at the closeness of the act brought a few quiet curses from his lips. “Oh god,” he whimpered, but the sound was cut off when Jongin pulled him back in for a kiss.

As Jongin continued to move his hips against him, Sehun wanted to speak up and remind him that if they continued this there would be a mess in their pants that they would have to deal with, but he couldn't find it in himself to pull away from the kiss long enough to do so.

With a particularly delicious thrust and a swipe of tongues against each other and Sehun was left breathless as he released in his pants, fingers clutching Jongin's shoulders as he did so. At the same time, Jongin was left groaning into his mouth and nails dug into Sehun's hips.

The next few moments passed without a word, both of them trying to regain their breath and recover from the shaking legs feeling. Sehun became aware of the mess in his underwear and immediately regretted that he hadn't stopped it, but when he felt Jongin's smile and a light kiss pressed against him, it didn't matter.

“That was fun,” the elder said, letting out a laugh.

“That was gross. Open the door, I think the chemicals are getting me high,” he playfully pushed against Jongin's shoulder. They both knew that he had enjoyed it more than he was willing to admit.

But Jongin opened the door, slipping out and pulling Sehun with him. “I think we should probably go shower,” he said with a slight frown.

Sehun rolled his eyes and took Jongin's hand to pull him back toward their dorm building.


	4. Double Penetration

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: threesome, the obvious DP. Spoiler/warning: sekaiyeol, bottom jongin

After the night in the closet, things had gotten a little chaotic around the campus. Midterms had fallen upon them seemingly without anyone planning for it well enough. Sehun had fallen into a rhythm of studying and going to class seemingly without end, trying to cram in the first half of the semester as quickly as he possibly could. He barely saw Jongin at all, only in passing on their ways to the dorm or the library, both a little too preoccupied with their respective studying schedules to give the rest much thought.

Sehun's roommate, Joonmyun, was seemingly never around. It wasn't for lack of studying, but had instead taken it upon himself to organize what seemed like half a dozen study groups and review sessions. Of course, Sehun really only garnered this information from the glimpse he'd gotten of Joonmyun's color-coded calendar while the older boy had been making a mad dash for lost notes.

However, as Friday afternoon rolled around that marked the end of the dreaded testing week, a sensation of complete and utter relaxation spread throughout the campus. It wasn't the same excitement that marked the end of finals period, where they would all get to go on a vacation or home – or even just somewhere without homework for a while – but it was the acknowledgment that half of the semester was over and they were that much closer to that needed break. Students were able to catch up on sleep that had been lost, hobbies abandoned, and for some, those hobbies ended up being a little more questionable.

Sehun was relaxing in his room, thankful for the fact that his last exam had gone reasonably well. And even if it hadn't, he was too exhausted to care. A knock on his door jarred him out of the movie he'd been watching, slipping an earphone out and calling out with a, “Yeah?” figuring it wasn't anything important.

When Jongin was the one to open the door, he proved correct. The slightly older boy shot him a wave, and Sehun felt his stomach clench. He remembered now that he was a bit thankful for the insanity that ended up being exams, it helped him to forget about the way he reacted anytime Jongin was near him lately. “'Sup?” Jongin greeted casually, flopping down on Joonmyun's straightened bed.

“You came in here,” he reminded him, but offered a small smile that betrayed his amusement.

“Details. I'm wiped. And Kyungsoo is hogging the room,” he complained, reaching for Joonmyun's calendar to flip through.

“What's he doing?”

“Hell if I know. Probably some circle jerk of Dungeons and Dragons geeks, I don't care. All I know is he told me to stay out for a while, so here I am,” he shrugged.

Sehun snorted at that image. “Right. Does that mean you're napping here or you want to do something?” he asked, not seeming phased one way or another.

“Hm. Good question. Where's Jujube or whatever?”

“Joonmyun. And I don't know, I've barely seen him this week. How'd midterms go, anyway?” he asked, slipping the other earphone out and tossing them onto the bed.

Jongin simply shrugged and put the calendar back on the desk. “I'm gonna nap,” he said instead and rolled over, not seeming to care that he was in someone else's room and someone else's bed.

-

It was a few hours later when Jongin woke up. Sehun had gone through two movies and too many energy drinks. Thankfully, Joonmyun was still AWOL so he hadn't been forced to explain why Jongin was asleep in his bed.

The older boy awoke with a groan, turning back over toward Sehun and blinked at him a few times, slightly disoriented. Sehun glanced over, aiming to simply greet him, only he was a bit struck for a moment at how beautifully disheveled the other looked. His hair was mussed and his eyes were sleepy, looking a bit like a puppy just waking up from a nap. “Hey,” he finally muttered.

“Yo,” Jongin greeted back, taking a moment to sit up. His voice was a bit gruff from the sleep. “What time is it?”

Sehun glanced down at the corner of his screen, slipping the earbuds out again. “Uh, 7:39,” he informed. “Feel better?” he asked, his lips curling in a half-smile.

“Mm, I think so. Hey, how long has it been?” he asked, something suddenly seeming to dawn on him.

The younger frowned slightly, “Uh, you were asleep for like three-”

“Not what I mean. I mean since...uh, C?” he still seemed to be gathering his thoughts.

“Oh,” Sehun muttered. He hadn't expected this conversation to come up. “I think a couple of weeks? We got busy,” he reminded. “Why? What's D?”

Jongin smiled, a lazy sort of moment. “It's a good one. Want to go for it tonight? There's a party, but there'll be one tomorrow too,” he shrugged.

Sehun's brow lifted slightly. “You never give up on this kind of thing, do you? But sure, whatever. Are you going to tell me what we're doing?”

“Hm. I think I'll wait. I have to make a phone call, and then we might go somewhere,” he promised, reaching into his pocket for his cell.

There wasn't much said, not enough that actually clued Sehun in on anything, before Jongin hung up. “Okay, come on,” he said.

“Where are we going?” Sehun questioned, but slipped his laptop off his legs and stood to follow the other even without an answer. They both knew that he didn't actually care if he had one or not.

Jongin didn't bother to give him one either, and instead just lead the way out of their dorm building and headed toward one of the others. Outside the doors stood Chanyeol, a smile spread too wide across his face when he caught sight of them. Sehun glanced at Jongin, but was given nothing.

“Let' go,” he said instead, and pulled Sehun along as Chanyeol unlocked the door to the building, leading them inside and down a long hallway.

The youngest still had no answers, and it was beginning to bother him a little bit, but he knew Jongin's impatience would prove to provide him with answers soon enough. Chanyeol unlocked the door to one of the dorms, letting them go in before him.

It was evidently confirmed upon entry that the dorm room they'd been lead to belonged to Chanyeol. It was clear in the displays of posters that showed his quirky sense of humor, a mix of odd clothes and hats strewn around. “You couldn't have cleaned up a little?” Jongin asked, a laugh tainting his voice.

“Eh, figured it didn't matter,” he said.

“Okay, so do either one of you want to tell me what's going on here?” Sehun asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

Chanyeol and Jongin seemed to exchange a glance, Chanyeol offering a shrug. “Well, Sehun, D is for...double. I mean I guess I could just stop there and a threesome would be enough to qualify...but I had another idea. If you're up for it,” Jongin said, his voice slipping into a soothing whisper. He took a step or two closer, an arm snaking around Sehun's waist. “See, it could also be for...double penetration. You don't have to, but I thought it might be fun,” he offered, nuzzling Sehun's neck softly.

Sehun had a feeling that Jongin was playing into his emotions, but he was sad to admit that it was working. “Uh. That sounds...painful,” he uttered, though he leaned into the older boy's arms.

“But it could be worth it,” he offered, placing a kiss to Sehun's soft skin.

Chanyeol remained silent, simply watching the two interact with a slight grin curving his mouth.

“Why don't you bottom for once, then? If you think it would be so fun,” the youngest said, trying to keep a certain edge to his voice even though they both knew he was willing to do many things for his friend.

Jongin tensed slightly at the suggestion. “I mean...I could. You'd be better at it, but if it would make you happy to fuck me with Chanyeol, then okay,” he whispered.

Sehun hadn't actually expected Jongin to agree, and had mostly just said it to get some kind of rise out of the other. But now that it was out there, Sehun could only glance at Chanyeol, who simply shrugged. “I don't care what you two agree on,” he confirmed.

Sehun resisted the urge to roll his eyes at that. “Well, I feel like you've been spoiling me a lot, so how about you do this one?”

Jongin hummed a little against his neck. “Okay,” he agreed, placing a kiss to the corner of Sehun's jaw.

After such confirmation, it didn't take long for the three boys to end up stripping their clothes off. Sehun felt slightly awkward about involving Chanyeol in the whole situation seeing as he and the older boy didn't know each other that well, after all, but he trusted Jongin's decisions.

“Get on the bed,” Chanyeol urged Jongin with a nod toward it. It was odd seeing Jongin not be in control for once, as Sehun had gotten used to that, but it was a bit of a turn on to see him actually comply and do as he was asked.

Sehun watched as Chanyeol ran long fingers down Jongin's spine, playing with him a little bit it seemed. The lube was next to the oldest boy's leg, and he reached to squirt some onto his fingers generously, Jongin's shoulders visibly tensing. Sehun wasn't used to watching this sort of spectacle, but he couldn't seem to look away for now. He gazed at the two lithe bodies as Chanyeol slipped digits inside the younger, the motion met with a sharp gasp, and he began to motion inside of him. It felt voyeuristic to be watching such an intimate act, but Sehun knew that it would only get better. He didn't move, however, until Chanyeol was three fingers deep inside Jongin, when the latter boy summoned Sehun over.

Jongin pulled him into a kiss, broken with little mewls and gasps from the older boy. Sehun ran his fingers through Jongin's hair, knowing that the older boy loved having his hair toyed with in any capacity. The kiss was simple, just lips moving against against each other easily, familiarity taking over. It was only when Jongin suddenly halted, letting out a long moan into the kiss that Sehun paused. He broke the kiss, looked behind the older boy to Chanyeol, who had slipped his length inside Jongin. Long fingers skimmed over Jongin's spine, attempting to soothe him and relax the boy into the feeling overtaking him.

“Fuck,” Jongin groaned, arching his back and pressing into the older.

Sehun felt flush, both immensely turned on by the sight of watching Jongin being fucked by his friend and a slight feeling of something he couldn't identify. Jealousy? Not quite, he had nothing to be jealous of. But perhaps it was some kind of insecurity over the situation.

“Why are you so impatient?” Jongin muttered, but didn't seem to be able to actually chide Chanyeol that much in his current position.

Chanyeol swatted the younger's hip. “Shut up and take it, bitch,” he joked.

There was something in the way they interacted that told Sehun that this wasn't the first time something like this had happened. He knew Jongin slept around sometimes, but it seemed he hadn't actually connected it to his other friends. The youngest was pulled from his thought, however, when Jongin pulled Sehun, urging him to get on the bed and lay in front of him.

He did as he was bid, leaning against the headboard, his legs spread on either side of Jongin. The slightly older boy reached out, nimble fingers stroking Sehun's length lazily. Sehun uttered a stifled moan, reaching forward again to run fingers through Jongin's hair.

Chanyeol was still thrusting inside Jongin, his movements slow and deep inside the other. Jongin leaned forward, pressing a kiss to the tip of Sehun's cock, tongue snaking out to run over the head. Sehun wasn't used to Jongin giving him a blowjob, normally he was the one to go down on the older boy, but he certainly wasn't going to complain.

Jongin moaned softly as he let Sehun's length slip into his mouth, the vibrations causing the youngest to gasp sharply. A few moments of Jongin bobbing along Sehun's dick later, and Chanyeol pulled the younger away. Sehun's eyes fluttered back open at the sudden removal of pleasure, only to be met with the sight of Chanyeol tilting Jongin's head back to kiss him quickly. Another moment of flushing insecurity swept over him, but the sight also brought a twitch to his cock.

“Are you ready, baby?” Chanyeol's deep voice asked, lips mumbling against Jongin's jaw.

“Yeah,” he whispered softly, moving away from Chanyeol so that he was straddling Sehun's legs. “Are you?” he asked the youngest before taking the lube Chanyeol offered, squirting it onto the youngest's length generously.

Sehun found himself unable to speak, and merely gave a nod. Jongin leaned forward, pressing a kiss to Sehun's lips before he lowered himself onto the younger's length, a low groan emitting from him. He could feel Chanyeol's eyes on them, and Sehun's hands went to Jongin's hips, wanting to hold him as close as he possibly could. He knew it wouldn't last long, but Sehun loved the feeling as though he and Jongin were the only two that mattered.

The reverie was interrupted, however, when Chanyeol slipped up behind Jongin, kisses pressed against his neck. He reached for the lubricant again, and the squirting sound alerted Sehun that Chanyeol was soon to join them.

He first felt the sensation of the other boy's length against his own, causing Sehun to bite his lip and hold on tighter to Jongin's hips, halting any movements from him. As Chanyeol began to slip inside as well, Jongin's eyes squeezed shut, jaw clenched in trying to relax at the intrusion. Sehun pressed kisses along the older boy's face, peppering them along his eyelids and cheeks to help him to be calm.

It took what felt like an eternity before Chanyeol was completely seated inside Jongin along with Sehun, though was realistically only a few moments. Jongin's breathing was shaky, seeming to try and calm himself and get used to the feeling without wanting to reject it. The feeling around Sehun's length felt simply tight, a tight heat surrounded his member and he was torn between wanting to thrust in and wanting to soothe Jongin.

Moments passed where nothing happened, where both Sehun and Chanyeol simply remained still to allow Jongin to make the first move as to when he wanted more. But finally, the middle boy rolled his hips just slightly, enough that the both of them got the hint. Chanyeol was the first to begin moving, shallowly thrusting into Jongin. The motions caused Sehun to moan softly before pulling Jongin into another kiss.

It wasn't long before they eased into a sort of slow rhythm, Chanyeol was the one to mostly set the paced while Sehun rolled his hips slowly into Jongin. The dual sensations of everything that was happening set the stage for none of it likely lasting very long, and the oldest boy was the first to come. It was with a loud groan that was cut off when he pressed his mouth to Jongin's shoulder, and Sehun could feel the warmth of his release inside the other.

“Oh fuck,” Chanyeol groaned before slipping out of the younger boy.

The sensation caused Jongin to whimper slightly, seemingly not quite sure what to do with the strange emptiness. But it only lasted a split moment before he grasped onto Sehun's shoulders and began to bounce on his lap.

A stream of curses escaped Sehun at the feeling, and his arms wrapped around Jongin's waist to hold him closer as they moved together, seeking their own releases. It wasn't long before they both hit their peak, surprisingly within only a mere moment of one another. Sehun came with a sharp gasp, fingernails digging into Jongin's skin. The older boy came with a low whimper, his head coming to rest in the crook of Sehun's neck as he rode out the last of the feeling that came over him.

Minutes passed in the afterglow, but it was only when Jongin moved to pull away from Sehun's embrace that the youngest finally opened his eyes. Chanyeol was watching them, his gaze amused and heavy as he did. Sehun helped Jongin by lifting him a bit, slipping out of him and nudging him to lay down on the bed.

“That was...different,” he offered a breathy laugh.

“Are you okay?” Sehun was the first to ask, brushing Jongin's hair out of his eyes.

“I think so. I'll let you know later when the pain sets in,” he half-joked.

Chanyeol handed both of the boys some tissues, allowing them to clean themselves up some. “Love to stick around this little love fest or whatever you two want to claim it is, but I have a party to go to. You can stay if you want,” the oldest shrugged, hopping up to grab his clothes.

Sehun watched him incredulously, “Seriously?” he asked, though it was more rhetorical than anything.

Jongin, however, laughed. “Ugh, we'll see. Sehun if you want to go with Chanyeol you can,” he offered, though it was apparent by his lazy demeanor that he himself wasn't about to move anytime soon.

The youngest glanced between them both, seeing Chanyeol shrug before walking out of his own room. “I'll stay with you for a few,” he offered, reaching out to play with Jongin's hair again. The older boy smiled a little and moved closer, laying his head against Sehun's chest comfortably.


	5. Exhibitionism

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: exhibitionism, face fucking, mild/past krishun

“I think I made a mistake,” Sehun said with a groan, rubbing a hand over his tired eyes.

Joonmyun watched him from the other side of the room, offering a soft hum. “How so? You don't enjoy it?” he asked, his tone and understanding as usual.

The younger shrugged. He'd asked Joonmyun for his opinion on his situation with Jongin, but they hadn't gotten very far. Sehun didn't want to put it all into words. “No, I do. It's just...like, I don't know. It started out as like something to do and didn't mean anything,” he faltered, unsure how to continue.

“But now...does it mean something?”

Sehun groaned again. “I don't know. It isn't supposed to. And I don't think it does to him. But I think...” he paused for a moment, “I have feelings for him.”

Joonmyun offered a nod. “Can you tell him?”

While the two roommates knew each other and got along well, this was a different level for them both. Generally Sehun didn't talk about personal things with almost anyone, but he felt as though he needed someone who wasn't involved to get their opinion. “Uh...I don't think so.”

“Why not?”

Sehun stared at him for a moment. “That's embarrassing, hello. Because he might not feel the same way. Because then we couldn't be just friends again. Because I'm really bad at talking about these things,” he complained.

Joonmyun shrugged. “Well don't you think everything has already changed anyway? I mean if you already have feelings for him, then you two can't ever go back to what you had before anyway.”

The younger didn't want to admit that he had a good point, but there was something about actually talking to Jongin about those feelings that sent waves of anxiety through him. “We'll see...”

-

“Sehun, we're going to Luhan's party tonight,” Jongin suddenly announced when Sehun answered the phone.

“Uh. You could ask or something. But okay. Why?” he asked, cradling the phone in his shoulder as he continued to type the essay that was due after the weekend.

“Because tonight's E.”

“I like how you never actually ask me anything. What does E stand for? Ecstasy?” Sehun's fingers paused above the keys.

“Nope. Exhibitionism. We're going to fuck in front of people. Well, don't worry it won't be like the video. But it'll be where people _could_ see us,” he explained.

“Oh god. Fine, but could we, like...talk?”

“Am I in trouble?” it was evident from Jongin's tone that he was smiling.

“No. But come over early?”

“Are you okay?” his voice took a more serious edge.

“I'm fine.”

“Sure, I'll come see you soon.”

Sehun hung up the phone, resisting the urge to groan or to text Jongin to say nevermind. This wasn't a conversation he wanted to have, but it was one he needed to have.

-

It was only a couple of hours later that the knock came to Sehun's door. Joonmyun had already left for the evening, and Sehun had already filled those couple of hours with showering, finishing his essay (an unusual feat), and simply panicking. “Yeah?” he called, knowing Jongin would just come in anyway.

And he was right, the older boy with the usual smile adorning his face entered the room with a nod. “Yo. You okay?” he asked, walking over to go sit on the edge of Sehun's bed.

“I'm fine. I just...there's something I wanted to talk about,” he said, though his stomach knotted at the very idea of actually uttering the words.

“You're starting to scare me,” Jongin admitted, though he gave a nervous sort of half-smile.

“Uh, you know this thing we've been doing? I just...don't know. Like...you and I...” he stuttered his way through the sentence, aware that it probably made very little sense.

“Having sex? What about it?”

“Does it...fuck. I don't want to like...make things awkward, but does it mean anything?” his voice went quiet at the end.

A brow raised, showing that Jongin had indeed heard him. “Mean anything? Isn't it just about fun? Unless you're trying to tell me something...?”

Sehun paused. He had the open, the invitation to say it. But visions of a future where he and Jongin were no longer friends infiltrated his mind. Visions of awkwardly glancing away whenever they crossed paths, of not hearing that casual laugh that filled him with such warmth. “Never mind, it's nothing,” he finally said.

“Sehun...you can tell me if something's bothering you,” Jongin coerced, reaching out to run his fingers over Sehun's hand.

“No, really, I'm fine. I just feel a little funny. Let's go to Luhan's,” he insisted, trying to smile and hopping up off of the bed. He thought he detected a soft sigh behind him, but paid no mind once Jongin joined him.

-

The party was pretty much the same as most others at the college. Luhan often held impromptu parties simply because his parents funded his own apartment. There was a mix of people that Sehun knew, and plenty he didn't. It was usually that way, though, the apartment crowded and loud beats reverberating off the walls.

Jongin pulled Sehun through the crowd as he weaved his way through, aiming to go to the kitchen. Sehun followed easily, not really wanting to end up separated anyway. Only a few bumps later, and they were successfully in the kitchen, where a whole new group of people were hanging out. Luhan was sitting on the counter, laughing and chatting with a weird kid named Tao. Jongin easily wove his way to them and said hello to Luhan. Sehun knew the other boy, they were sort of friends, but not too much of note. Truthfully, Sehun didn't have many people he was all that close to. He hung out with people and showed up for parties, he wasn't a social reject or anything, he was just a bit more introverted than some of the other people he was around.

“Hey, Sehun, how's it going?” came a deep voice behind him.

He turned, unsure who to expect, when a familiar face appeared. “Oh, hey, Kris. It's...going, you?” he asked in return. He and Kris had gone on a few dates a couple of years back, before Kris had gone to England for a semester abroad.

When he'd returned, they hadn't bothered to rekindle whatever had been between them. It wasn't that they had fallen apart on bad terms, only that it had been easier. So when they saw one another they were still friendly. “It's been a while. You want a drink?” Kris offered.

Sehun shrugged, and Kris seemed to take that as an affirmative and disappeared for another moment before returning to hand Sehun a bottle. “Thanks,” he said and took a sip of the slightly bitter liquid.

Kris stepped a little bit closer, probably to be heard. “What have you been up to?” he asked.

Sehun knew that Jongin could easily keep himself occupied, and it wasn't as though he owed it to him to stick around and wait. So instead of struggling to hear Kris, he took hold of his arm and nudged him to follow along behind him. He lead the other boy out to the balcony, where there were only a couple of stragglers smoking. Sehun sat down, letting his legs hang off the edge of the balcony, between the bars. Kris leaned against the bars, towering above the younger. “I haven't been up to much,” Sehun finally answered, “classes have kept me busy mostly. And you?”

“Not much. I've been working a lot...are you alright? You seem kind of...off tonight.”

Sehun glanced up and let out a quiet sigh. “Sorry. I don't know, I'm just kind of...thinking about something I guess,” he said, not knowing how to make himself seem more like Kris was used to.

“Want to talk about it? Something to do with that guy in there?” Kris asked, a brow lifting.

Looking back down, Sehun took another long drink of the alcohol. “Good guess...”

“You kept glancing at him. It just seemed kind of...yeah.”

“Yeah, something like that. I guess I'm just kind of realizing I might have feelings for him. But I don't know how to tell him. This is so stupid, it's so high school,” he groaned.

There was a bit of silence, but it was comfortable somehow. The campus grounds were spread out before them, darkened with the night. “You know you probably have to tell him though, right?” he mentioned.

Sehun nodded. “I know. But I still don't want to like...ruin everything,” he sighed.

Suddenly Kris knelt down, resting on his knees, and hooked a finger under Sehun's chin to turn his face toward him. A soft inhale gave way that Sehun had an idea of what was coming, but when Kris leaned forward and pressed his lips against his, he still felt himself tense. The kiss wasn't prying, just a soft little press of lips. It was so different from kissing Jongin, whose lips were soft and pliant. Kris was more insistent and pressing. It only lasted what had to have been moments, but when Kris pulled away it took Sehun another moment to open his eyes again. “What was that?” his voice came out soft.

“I just wanted to. And maybe it helped you figure something out,” Kris offered.

Another pause, and the younger dwelled for a moment on the fact that even though Kris had kissed him, his thoughts had turned to Jongin. A slight smile came to his face, “Thanks, I think.”

Instead of waiting for some kind of answer from Kris, however, Sehun squirmed his way into standing, aiming to go find Jongin. Except when he turned, Jongin was there. He stood in the doorway, as though he was just about to go onto the balcony when he saw Sehun. His face was blank, and they watched each other for a moment before Jongin simply shrugged before turning back to go inside.

Cursing quietly, Sehun went after him, thankful for once that the apartment was so crowded so it was easy to catch up to the other. “Hey, what's wrong?” he asked, feeling strangely as though Jongin was mad at him.

Jongin turned, a frown on his handsome face. “Nothing, go back to whatever you were doing,” he said, trying to shake him off.

“Are you mad that Kris kissed me?” The thought was bizarre, he hadn't ever known Jongin to be jealous. After all, there was nothing for him to be jealous of.

“No. I don't care,” he insisted, but the clipped tone told that he very much did care.

Sehun reached out, grabbing hold of Jongin's arm to stop him from attempting to weave through the crowd some more. Except when he did, Jongin spun around, pushing Sehun against the wall behind him. “I don't want to care. But I saw him kiss you and it pissed me off. So shut up,” he half-growled, but instead of allowing Sehun to speak, he leaned against him, pressing his mouth against the other's.

A quiet moan left Sehun's lips, arching into the kiss in trying to show Jongin how much he cared for him, how much he desired him. The older boy nipped Sehun's bottom lip, his body language still seeming a bit more aggressive than usual.

Sehun broke the kiss to catch his breath. “Jongin, talk to me,” he requested, but was silenced by Jongin pressing a finger against his lips.

“I said shut up. I don't want to talk about it right now. Get on your knees,” he ordered.

The younger watched Jongin's face for a moment, hoping that he was joking. He knew, of course, that if he didn't want to that he could just say so, but there was always something about Jongin being dominant that did things to him. Plus, he wanted to try and show him something. He recalled that the older boy had said that the night was intended for exhibitionism, and he wondered briefly if this was just part of the charade.

However, when Jongin gave him a look, Sehun glanced around them, not seeing too many people, and slipped down to his knees. The thought that anyone could see this – including Kris – sent a wave of nervous excitement through him, but he didn't want to back down now. Fingers slipped up to the waistband of Jongin's jeans, undoing them for the older boy. Jongin pushed his fingers away for a moment, however, and reached down himself to pull his length out of his underwear, pushing them down just enough that Sehun could gain access but that he wouldn't be overly exposed to those around him.

Sehun glanced up to his friend's face, but it still held the same stony blankness as before. So instead of attempting conversation again, he reached out and began to stroke the older boy to hardness. His strokes were slow, a bit unsure about the entire situation. He didn't like that he may have upset Jongin, but a part of him was thrilled by the thought that he may be jealous, as that insinuated that he had more feelings for him than simply friendly.

Instead of thinking, however, Sehun leaned forward, pressing soft kisses to the tip of Jongin's cock. Normally, Jongin was rather vocal when under any kind of pleasure, but there was nothing. The younger ran his tongue around the head of his length, pressing against the sensitive opening. A glance upward told him that Jongin was enjoying it, his eyes closed and his lip caught in his teeth, but he seemed to be fighting any urge to actually make sounds.

So Sehun knew he simply had to work harder, and ran his tongue down along the vein that trailed his cock, then up and let the length slip into his mouth. He forgot about the fact that they could easily be seen, and only focused on bobbing along the older boy's length, trying to elicit some pleasure out of him as he pressed his tongue against the sensitive areas as he moved.

A soft gasp alerted him that Jongin was slipping from his stony facade, and he heard a soft thump against the wall that told him the other was bracing himself against it. Sehun moved quicker, hollowing his cheeks out to attempt and give the other as much as he possibly could. A hand wove its way into Sehun's hair, stilling him. “Keep your mouth open,” Jongin commanded.

The younger was a bit hesitant, but did as he was asked, and it was only then that Jongin began thrusting into his mouth. The sensation was odd, normally he ended up holding Jongin's hips down in order to keep him from thrusting too much. But if this was what Jongin wanted, then he would comply. The older boy's thrusts started fairly shallow, but without warning, he suddenly thrust in deeply, causing Sehun's gag reflex to kick in, choking around his cock.

But that didn't stop Jongin, who simply continued to hold him there and fucked his mouth. A moan escaped the younger's throat as the older boy assaulted his mouth and throat, trying to allow Jongin to bring himself to the edge.

Finally, his hips stuttered, and Sehun took that as the initiative to wrap his lips around Jongin's length again, sucking him as Jongin hit his release. Warmth slipped into Sehun's mouth and down his throat, but he kept stroking the other through his orgasm. After a few moments, Jongin slipped out of the other's mouth, immediately reaching to tuck himself back into his pants.

Sehun swallowed the come in his mouth, reaching up to swipe at the come and saliva that had slipped out during the moment. Glancing back up to Jongin's face, he looked tired, but not as stony as he had before. A hand reached out, offering to help Sehun up. The younger took it, his knees feeling a bit wobbly from being down on them for so long. With a glance around him, he could detect that a handful of people had seen what occurred between them, and he felt another wave of embarrassment.

“Um, Jongin?” he asked, wanting to return to the moment before.

Except his friend just shook his head. “It's cool. I'm going to go back to hang out,” he said, and Sehun knew it was a kiss-off for the time being. He wouldn't get his chance to explain things yet.


	6. Food Play

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: some krishun, angst

The days after the party interaction at Luhan's was met with a lot of confusion on Sehun's part. He wasn't sure what all of it meant for he and Jongin's friendship, or even partially what Kris meant by all of it. He'd said that it was to help him realize his feelings for his friend, but he couldn't be sure. There was something familiar in it, even though their relationship hadn't meant much at the time.

It was odd that Jongin also didn't seem to be coming to talk to him, something that made a pit appear in the pit of Sehun's stomach. So after only a few days, he slipped out of his room and traipsed down the hall toward his friend's room. He knocked, only to be met with a grunt of acknowledgment that he took as some kind of invite. Opening the door, he glanced first over to Kyungsoo, curled up on his side asleep away from them. Then his gaze slipped to Jongin, who was hunched over a textbook on his bed. However, upon seeing Sehun, he hummed a little. “Hey,” he said, casual as ever.

But the younger knew that it was clearly not anything as normal. “Um, hi. Can we talk?” he asked, arms crossing over his stomach.

“Like that riveting conversation you wanted to have before?” the older boy asked, a brow lifting pointedly.

“Um, no. But can we?” Sehun wasn't sure how this was going to go, or if Jongin was actually upset at him.

“Go ahead, then, he's asleep. Probably won't wake up,” he shrugged, flipping the textbook shut and waiting on Sehun expectantly.

It was awkward, generally Sehun was the silent one, and Jongin was the one who tried so often. But the different turn of events made it strange. “About the other night...I...I don't really know what happened. I mean...it seemed like you were really mad and I'm sorry, but I really don't know what I did or what's going on,” he admitted.

Jongin nodded, not seeming upset by Sehun's confusion at least. Something in him seemed to deflate at the topic. “Yeah, I should explain. See, I shouldn't have gotten upset. It was dumb. But I saw that guy kiss you-”

“Kris,” Sehun interjected.

“Right, Kris. Whatever. He kissed you, and something in me just kind of...snapped. I didn't like it. And I can't explain it, because it's not like we're dating and I had no reason to get mad...” he trailed off.

The knot in Sehun's stomach tightened. Was that some semblance of hope in Jongin's voice or was he just imagining it? “Then why did you?” he asked, though his voice felt thin and strangled.

“That's the thing. I...come here,” Jongin reached out a hand, whatever remaining anger he'd had earlier seeming to fade completely.

Sehun frowned a little, but he went over to the older boy. “What?”

Jongin reached out to grab Sehun's hand. “Um, I'm a little nervous here. See...that's the thing. I do like you...of course I like you...”

“...But?”

“You know it hasn't been that long since my breakup, right? I just don't want to move on so quickly, and I don't want to jump into something that might ruin a friendship that's been so strong for so many years, you know?” he explained, thumb caressing Sehun's knuckles. “I just don't think it's right for me now.”

Sehun felt the knot move, as though he wanted to throw up instead of just remain still. And yet he couldn't. “Right. Uh, it's cool,” he offered, though he was feeling anything but, “I mean I thought we agreed before that we were only friends. So I just didn't know why you got pissed.” Sounded plausible enough.

“Are you okay? I mean, are we still good? This isn't going to make things weird?”

The younger wanted to tell him that everything was already weird. That everything was already ruined and that he wanted to be more than someone Jongin fucked when he felt like it. He knew he was better than that, knew that he had every right to demand more than that. And yet he couldn't choke out any of those things. “No, it's fine. I was just curious what was going on I guess. But, uh, I have somewhere to be,” he slipped his hand out of Jongin's, turning around to leave.

“Sehun...” Jongin paused, “Never mind. Drop by later?”  
“Yeah, sure,” Sehun agreed without turning around. He couldn't.

-

Something about Jongin confirming that they were nothing more than friends with benefits spawned something in the younger. He was irritated, but not exactly at his friend. It was more at himself, for not predicting that this would happen. And at not saying anything to Jongin to let him know that it wasn't okay, that he wanted something besides an occasional fuck. But he had been too on the verge of throwing up to actually say anything at the time. He hated that, and he felt like a coward.

Instead of dwelling on it, however, he texted Kris, asking him to meet at the bar near campus. It was the simple fact that he didn't know what to do, he didn't really want to react in some way that would ruin things between them, so he found it simpler to just distract himself.

When Kris showed up, Sehun already one drink in, he began to re-think the whole situation. That even if he and Jongin couldn't be much more than they were, it was enough for the moment. But when the older boy sat down, he offered a small smile. “Hey, Kris,” he greeted.

“Hey. So, what's wrong?” he asked, instead of playing with small talk.

Sehun shrugged, not feeling particularly up to lying about it. That's why he'd called Kris, after all, to talk to someone familiar. Anyone that wasn't Jongin. Not right now. “Just...everything,” he half-laughed before going into a brief explanation of how Jongin had made it abundantly clear that they were only friends.

“Ouch. So then what was that thing about him getting weirdly upset when I kissed you?” he asked, an eyebrow lifting.

Sehun had almost forgotten about that particular moment. “Mm...I think he's confused. I don't know, maybe I am. I don't want to talk about him...” he grumbled, tossing back another drink.

It was a few more drinks in when Kris kissed him again, and this time Sehun didn't pull away. His thoughts traveled to Jongin again, naturally, but he tried to only push them away and he ended up pulling the other closer.

It wasn't long before they ended up leaving, Kris leading Sehun back to his dorm with moments of distracting kisses. Moments of doubt flitted through the younger's mind, but he didn't allow himself to push the older boy away. When Kris fucked him on his bed, face pressed into the pillows, Sehun could only think about how different it was from Jongin. Kris was rougher, there was a harsh snap to his hips every time where with Jongin there would be little moments that displayed his care, such as little kisses pressed to his shoulder or fingers grazing along his spine to soothe him.

When they finished, Kris tossed Sehun a towel to wipe himself off with and rolled away to drift off to sleep. In the moments afterword, Sehun felt a pang of regret and a wave of unease. But it was too late to do much about it, so he only slipped out of the bed to put his clothes back on. His buzz had worn off in the time it had taken to get fucked by Kris, and all he could think about was leaving to go back to his own dorm.

“You okay?” Kris mumbled at him as he was putting his shirt on.

Sehun shrugged. “Yeah. I'll call you later, I have to go,” he excused himself before leaving the room.

-

Sehun was never exactly the lucky type, so when he finally made it across campus to his own building, the first person he ran into was none other than Jongin. The slightly older boy was laughing with Chanyeol in the hallway, though when he saw Sehun he glanced over, the remains of a smile painted on his face.

Another pang of regret hit him in the stomach as he did, and he attempted to merely walk away from them both when Jongin stepped away from Chanyeol. “Hey, are you okay?” he asked, seeming to see something in Sehun that said otherwise.

“Oh...yeah,” he nodded, though he could feel a strange look directed toward him from Chanyeol.

“Uh, I'll talk to you later,” Jongin said toward Chanyeol before walking with Sehun to his dorm.

Truthfully, Sehun didn't know what to say. It was weird, even though they had just made it specifically clear that they were nothing more than friends, he still felt guilty about what had just occurred with Kris. Entering his room, he left it open so that Jongin could feel free to enter if he liked.

“Okay, what's wrong? You smell like booze and you look like you were just attacked by the cookie monster or something,” Jongin laughed.

The sound of his voice sent another pang through Sehun, but he offered a slight smile at the words. “I don't know, just kind of a rough day, I guess,” he offered instead and flopped onto his bed.

“Sorry, I guess I might have had something to do with that?” he asked, but instead of prying he simply sat down on the bottom of his bed as well.

Instead of answering, Sehun shrugged. He didn't want to talk about it, didn't want to give Jongin the satisfaction of knowing that it bothered him so much. Not that it wasn't obvious.

“Well...if you don't want to talk about it...” Jongin hummed. “I'm sorry, though. Either way. Hey, where did you get the hickey?” he asked instead, a laugh seeming to play on his lips.

Sehun could feel his cheeks heat up and knew he was likely blushing, a hand going to the spot on his neck that stung a little. At least that explained why. “Cookie monster, remember?”

The older boy snorted. “It doesn't matter, I was just wondering. You're usually such a prude.”

“I am not. It was Kris,” he finally muttered, though he didn't know why he even bothered to say so. Maybe he wanted him to be jealous.

“Mm, I suspected that. So are you two going to be a thing now or something?” it seemed as though Jongin was being very careful about his tone, as though he was trying to protect it from slipping into some kind of emotion.

“Probably not. It was just...you know,” he said, though he still didn't bother to look up at Jongin or move from his position.

“Hm. Well, just in case, I have something that will make you feel better. Be right back,” he slipped off the bed and left.

Sehun didn't know what was going on, but he simply lay on the bed and waited. He didn't know what kind of sign it was that Jongin didn't seem to mind one way or another, when last time he'd gotten so upset. He didn't know what he was expecting.

It was only a few moments later that Jongin returned, pushing the door shut behind him and pushing in the lock. “Here,” he held a can of whipped cream.

Sehun lifted a brow, “Without ice cream that probably won't make me feel that much better,” he attempted a laugh, though he still felt strange about everything.

“Shut up,” the older boy said, though he moved over to the bed and slipped onto it, tossing a leg over Sehun's hips and straddled his hips.

“What are you doing?” he asked, though a tingle went down his spine at having Jongin be so close to him.

“Making you feel better. Stop talking,” Jongin laughed, and shook the can before offering it above Sehun's mouth.

A smile adorned his face briefly before he complied, and Jongin squirted the cream into his mouth. Before Sehun could even swallow it, however, Jongin leaned down and swiped his tongue into the cream, swiping against Sehun's tongue as well. A quiet sound escaped him before he reached out to place his hands on Jongin's hips and pulled him in for an actual kiss. It was soft, familiar. Jongin cupped Sehun's cheek, his thumb tenderly caressing the soft skin for a moment before he pulled back.

The older boy slipped down to between Sehun's legs, his fingers reaching for the buttons on his jeans.

“You don't have to do that...” Sehun muttered, but he also wasn't going to push him away all that much.

“Shh, I want to,” Jongin said, sliding the younger's jeans down his hips just enough to reach in and stroke Sehun's length, pulling his cock out and pressing a quick kiss to the tip. He began to stroke him to full hardness, only halting when Sehun uttered a soft moan.

The younger bit his lip to reign in further sounds, watching Jongin through his lashes. He watched Jongin pick up the canister again, squirting out some of the fluffy cream onto his cock. Sehun flinched at the strangely cold sensation, but only continued to watch as Jongin's tongue snaked out to taste the whipped cream, sending a strange contrasting sensation through Sehun.

Jongin worked his way along the younger's length, licking the cream off of his cock with kitten-ish licks. It was frustrating, wanting so much more than the teasing touches he was receiving. The younger offered a quiet plea of the older's name, his hips bucking softly under Jongin.

As a result, Jongin reached out to hold his hips down as he continued the agonizingly slow progression of licking the cream off of Sehun's length. There was something so perfectly gorgeous about Jongin this way, his pretty lips wrapped around his cock in a strange juxtaposition of lewd and yet somehow perfectly innocent. Or maybe that was only Sehun who saw him that way. “Baby, please,” he groaned.

While Jongin didn't say anything, he did comply enough to let Sehun's length slip into his mouth. Sehun groaned, hands reaching out to run through Jongin's hair. The older began bobbing along his length, cheeks hollowed in his effort to give Sehun pleasure.

It didn't take long, Sehun already still sensitive from having been fucked earlier, and Jongin's beautiful lips wrapped around him was all he needed. A few more bobs along his cock, and Sehun was releasing, coming into Jongin's mouth with a long moan.

The older boy let Sehun's cock slip out of his mouth with a lewd sound, swallowing his release and swiping at his lips. “Feel better?” he asked playfully.

Sehun only groaned quietly, too tired to even bother re-buttoning himself at the moment. “Shut up,” he snorted.

Jongin reached to do him the favor of re-buttoning him, Sehun grunting his appreciation.

“Can I confess something to you?” the younger said suddenly.

The older boy slipped in to lay beside Sehun. “I guess.”

“I might have only slept with Kris to make you jealous,” he admitted.

Jongin was silent for a moment, but a smile appeared on his face a moment later. “It's okay. Can I make a confession now?”

“...If you must.”

“I actually was jealous. But I didn't want to be, so I just wanted to prove that I could please you better than he could,” Jongin laughed quietly, but when Sehun glanced at him, he could see a faint blush tinge his cheeks. It had been a while since he'd seen that shy side of him, and he could feel another tingle go down his spine.

“I like you, Jongin. I know we already talked about not actually going out...and that's okay with me, I just want you to know.”

Instead of answering him, however, Jongin simply pulled Sehun in for a soft kiss.


	7. Gagging + Garment play

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: crossdressing, mild bdsm (mainly the gagging)

“So are you two like...dating?” Chanyeol asked, sitting across the table stirring his coffee.

Sehun glanced toward Jongin sitting next to him, and shrugged.

“We're...uh, I don't know. Complicated? But we don't want to label it,” Jongin offered.

Chanyeol stared at them both for a skeptical moment. “What the hell is that even supposed to mean?”

“It means mind your own business,” Sehun spoke up, tossing a wrapper at the older boy.

“No, okay, but like...I'm too involved in this now. You have to tell me. Jongin will anyway, later,” he said.

Jongin snorted softly beside him, and Sehun rolled his eyes. “It means just what he said. We don't know what we are. We agreed we don't want to, like...sleep with other people, but...I don't know,” he grumbled.

“...So doesn't that pretty much mean you're together?” Chanyeol pressed.

“Shut up,” Jongin said with a laugh, “I guess we kind of are? But it's on...a trial basis for now?”

The words were true, Sehun was aware of that, but it still sent a pang through him. It was better than nothing, of course, and they had agreed not to sleep with anyone else, but Jongin had strayed away from wanting to make anything official. And while Sehun didn't need to have labels to feel okay with it, it did make him question what doubts still remained with Jongin that he would avoid that so much. And a 'trial basis' made it sound as though he was applying for some kind of job.

“Hm, okay. If you say so,” Chanyeol shrugged, a smile playing on his lips.

“Shut up,” Jongin repeated before standing. “Come on, Sehun, we have to go somewhere.”

-

When they reached Jongin's dorm room, Sehun was already in full-on complaint mode. “I'm not doing that, I don't know why I let you talk me into it.”

“Oh come on, it'll be fun,” Jongin assured him.

It was only after Sehun rolled his eyes at the other that he noticed Kyungsoo. “Oh, hey,” he greeted.

“Don't mind me,” Jongin's roommate waved at them from where he was reading a textbook.

Jongin looked between Sehun and Kyungsoo for a brief moment. “Actually, Soo, could you leave?”

“No, don't,” Sehun said.

Kyungsoo stared at them for a moment. “I don't think I want to know. But fine, fine. How long until I can come back?”

It was strangely amusing how used to this Kyungsoo seemed to be, that it was just a matter of fact occurrence. “I don't know, I'll text you.”

With a shrug, the older boy stood and slipped his book into his bag. “I had a study group tonight anyway,” he offered as he went to leave. “Have fun.”

Sehun waited until the door was closed. “That was so rude, why would you just make him leave like that?”

“Because I don't think you want him here for this. Unless you wanted him to join, that is, but I don't think that's up his alley,” he snorted.

“Shut up, you know what I meant. You didn't have to throw him out, we can wait you know.”

Instead of continuing to argue with him, however, Jongin merely held out the bag to Sehun. “Come on, baby, it'll be hot,” he coerced.

The younger sighed, knowing that he would probably end up regretting this later, but took the bag from him. “Fine, but turn around.”

“Are you seriously being shy right now?”

“Just do it,” Sehun whined at him before Jongin complied, turning away from Sehun. The younger peered into the bag with a sigh, the frills peering at him mockingly. He still couldn't be completely sure how he'd gotten talked into dressing up for Jongin. Only that he would end up doing pretty much anything for the other male. So he slipped off his clothes and began working the stockings over his legs. They were white and lacy, and the material was so soft against his legs. It was strange, this was lightyears out of his comfort zone, but he was strangely very thrilled by the whole prospect of dressing up for Jongin. Once those were on, he moved to slip on the outfit that Jongin had insisted on, a french-maid type outfit with a short fluffy skirt in black and white and a corset that hugged his torso. Once it was on, he certainly felt a bit odd, too exposed and too confined all at once. He looked at the silky undies that Jongin had also insisted on, and ignored them, he didn't want to go that far.

“Okay...fine, you can look,” he mumbled, though he could feel a hot blush creeping over his cheeks. He wondered, not for the first time, why he couldn't seem to say no to Jongin.

Jongin turned, eyes immediately roving over the outfit and Sehun's body. “You look gorgeous,” he said, voice catching slightly in the back of his throat. “Turn around.”

Sehun wasn't sure if he was effected by the compliment or just the simple fact that he wanted to please Jongin, but after just a moment's hesitation he did as he was asked and turned, feeling the other's eyes on his backside. “Like what you see?” he asked playfully, and leaned over just slightly to let Jongin see more of his thighs.

“Sehun...baby,” came the choked voice, and it was only a moment later that the younger sense Jongin moving closer, and a hand landed on his hip. “You look amazing,” he re-iterated before his hands went to trail along the fluffy skirt until he smoothed his hands down over stocking-covered thighs.

A shiver went through the younger at the sensation, and he straightened up slightly in order to press back against Jongin, his back flush against his chest. “Do you like it?” he asked, though he liked the way that he felt as though he had control of the situation for the moment. That Jongin was too enamored of him for the moment to take control, so Sehun reached down and took hold of the other's hands, pulling his arms around his waist.

“I love it,” Jongin confirmed, leaning down and pressing soft kisses to Sehun's neck.

The skirt made it so sensations against him were dulled a bit, but even do he could still detect the faint feeling of Jongin's bulge pressing against him. “Tell me what you want,” he said softly, rolling his hips softly back into the other's hips.

A soft groan emitted from the elder's lips into Sehun's skin. “I want you. All of you,” he said, trailing his hands back down over Sehun's body.

“How do you want me? Do you want to fuck me from behind just like this? Or do you want me to bounce on your lap on the bed?” Normally he didn't feel completely comfortable talking that way in situations, that was easily more Jongin's forte, but something about the situation suddenly made him feel strangely empowered.

Jongin's fingers clutched tighter onto Sehun's hips at his words. “Come here, I bought something else while we were out,” he mumbled and drew away from him.

The younger lifted a brow, but turned around in order to watch what he was doing. Jongin slipped out something that looked like a strap with a black ball attached in the middle. The lifted brow turned into a furrow as he recalled a weird porn that Jongin had shown him some time ago that involved gagging. "Wait a second, that isn't-"

The older smiled a little before offering a shrug. "It is. I thought it might be fun to combine this with that sweet little dress," he explained calmly. He took a few steps closer to the other. "Come on, it'll be fun," he coerced, lifting the ball part to Sehun's lips. 

He hesitated for a moment, knowing that agreeing to this meant he couldn't actually say anything to the other and his sounds would be muffled and his jaw would probably get sore. But after all, he could never really say no to Jongin, so he parted his lips and opened up so that the other boy could push the ball into his mouth. He was right, it was a bit uncomfortable, but he knew it wasn't unbearable or anything. 

Jongin pulled the strap and clasped it securely before pulling away to simply look at him for a moment. "See? Gorgeous," he said and his hands went again to Sehun's hips, leading him toward the bed and instructed him to lay down. 

It was strange to not be able to actually say anything, but he complied and lay on the bed, waiting for Jongin to come to him. It didn't take long, the older boy crawled over to him and settled himself between his legs, glancing up at the younger's face. He mumbled an incoherent sound against the gag, something that was partially a plea for something to happen and partially a sound of irritation. Ignoring him, the older boy let his hands roam along the milky expanse of Sehun's thighs, fingertips just lightly brushing against him.

Sehun's cock twitched under the skirt, legs parting slightly in invitation and anticipation. Fingers wrapped around the base of his length, pulling lightly on his cock to urge him further into hardness. The younger moaned against the gag, the sound muffled. But Jongin seemed to take the hint anyway, and flipped the skirt upward so that he could have full access to him. “Little slut, you didn't even bother to wear underwear,” Jongin teased, but before Sehun could even utter another unintelligible sound at him he let his length slip into his mouth, and his eyes fluttered closed.

Muffled moans resounded, and Sehun wished that he could actually say something or at least not be confined as he was. He wanted to moan the other's name, wanted to let him know how wonderful his hot mouth felt against his cock. But before he could even ease into the sensation of Jongin sucking him off, a finger – wet with saliva – prodded at his ass. He jerked softly at the unexpected sensation, but fingers quickly dug into the sheet below him when the older boy began to ease his finger inside him.

Sehun spread his legs a bit further, trying to urge Jongin to move a little faster. He was feeling impatient, and his cock was already nearing the edge of painfully hard. It had been too long since he'd been this turned on, and when Jongin added a second finger and began to scissor he was already reduced to muffled whimpers.

His jaw was already aching from being held open for so long, but considering Jongin seemed to like it so much he didn't want to bother to request anything. And besides, he knew he frequently ended up embarrassed at he sounds he ended up making anyway. After a few moments of the other scissoring him, and Jongin pressing kisses along his hipbones, he pulled away.

The younger's eyes opened again, watching Jongin as he stripped off his shirt and tossed it to the floor. Another thrill of pleasure ran through him at the sight of his lover's body, and he knew that if he was able to speak he would probably be begging already. Thankfully, Jongin didn't take long to remove the rest of his clothes and grab the lube from the drawer. Resuming his previous position between the younger's legs, he smiled a little at the other, a comforting sort of moment before he leaned down and pressed a kiss to Sehun's forehead. The affectionate moment contrasted with the next movement when Jongin reached between them to position his cock to Sehun's ass, slowly pushing inside of him.

Sounds muffled against the gag, and Sehun reached up to wind his arms around the older's chest, nails digging lightly into his tanned shoulders. Biting his lip, Jongin began to set up a slow rhythm that resonated deep inside of him. Although he hadn't adjusted fully yet, and there was a small amount of pain that shot through the lower bit of his spine, he didn't bother to try and get him to slow down and only held him closer.

“So fucking hot,” Jongin reiterated before he snapped his hips harshly inside of him.

A twitch went through his length at the combination of the words and the sudden change in pace, and Sehun could only wind his legs around the other's hips, wanting to pull him deeper inside. Jongin moaned softly at the sensation, his thrusts picking up speed at Sehun's seeming desire for more.

And the younger was glad for it, as his nails dug harshly into the older's skin, running along his back and his head tilted back into the pillow to attempt and stave off his impending climax. It hadn't been long enough, he told himself, but he knew that he'd been too turned on in the first place to last very long.

But Jongin seemed to be in a similar situation, as his hips began to get a bit more erratic in their rhythm. Readjusting, the older lowered himself to his elbows, pressing kisses to the sweaty skin of Sehun's neck as he continued thrusting into him.

It wasn't long before Sehun hit his peak, the friction of Jongin's hips rubbing against the skirt enough to send him over the edge. Arching up off the bed, Sehun let out a series of strange sounds against the gag, legs tightening around the other's hips.

It was only a moment later that Jongin hit his as well, evident in the way that he suddenly froze inside of him and the soft curses that slipped out of his lips. “Oh my god,” he mumbled softly a few moments later, after Sehun's legs had dropped from around his hips.

A gurgled sound reminded the older that Sehun was still gagged, and with a weak laugh, he reached up to help him undo it before pulling out of him. A sigh of relief escaped the younger at the sudden loss of both sensations, and his fingers went to his jaw to massage the area. “That was fucking uncomfortable,” he complained, his voice hoarse.

“Shut up, obviously you liked it,” Jongin pointed out before reaching to pick up his shirt and swipe at the come that had released onto the skirt.

“Fuck you,” he muttered weakly, but there was no bite in it as he moved to undo the outfit. “Help me,” he requested, offering a slight smile.

The older made a playful face at him, but reached over to pull the dress down, urging Sehun to lift his hips when he got there. When the dress was on the floor as well, long fingers went to slip the stockings down off his thighs, the sensation sending a tingle down Sehun's spine.

Once everything was off, Jongin moved to lay down next to the other, an arm wrapping around him. “You know what I didn't like, though?”

“Hm?” Sehun mumbled, snuggling himself into the other.

“That I couldn't kiss you,” he said softly, nuzzling into his neck.

A moment passed, one where Sehun froze at the sound of his voice and the implied affection behind it. They may not have been anything officially, or anything that even they could name, but there was definitely something there. “You cheesy fuck,” Sehun murmured, never one to let things get emotional for long. But in contrast with his words, he turned his head, nuzzling Jongin's nose softly with his own before he tilted his head and pressed his lips against his.


	8. Hand Jobs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: none, it's borderline pg13

__Sehun let out a soft sigh before his eyes fluttered open, the feeling of lips caressing his shoulder waking him from his sleep. “What are you doing?” he asked, voice raspy and barely audible.

A smile could be felt against his skin. “Seeing what it would take to wake you up,” came the answer, his voice sounding much more aware than Sehun's own, a playful edge in it.

“What time is it?” the younger turned a bit so that he could lay on his back, breaking the contact that the other had with him. It was the night right after their encounter with the gag, and his jaw was still a little tender.

“I think around 9,” he said softly, another smile coming to his face before he leaned in and pressed a kiss to Sehun's lips.

The younger made a quiet sound against Jongin, but returned the kiss for a brief moment. “Stop that, we both have gross breath,” he laughed a little, but was only met with Jongin's arms winding around his waist to pull him closer.

“Do I look like I mind?”

“You're horny,” Sehun accused.

“Maybe,” the elder condoned, and leaned in for another kiss, a leg wrapping around Sehun's. When Jongin was still tired from sleep, he tended to be a bit softer than he might otherwise be. Sehun loved those moments.

So instead of saying anything, however, he simply allowed it to continue, tilting his head into the kiss, allowing Jongin to slip his tongue past his lips. The older boy explored his mouth teasingly, tongue scraping over his teeth and curling around Sehun's own. With a soft nibble to Jongin's bottom lip, the younger pulled away, “Didn't we just fuck a few hours ago?” he reminded him with a snort of laughter.

“Since when has that ever mattered?” he asked with a little laugh before he suddenly broke his own train of thought, “I dreamt of you,” Jongin said softly, a hand coming to cup Sehun's cheek. “We moved in together, and we adopted a raccoon.”

“A racoon? Why not a dog or a cat?” Sehun asked, though his stomach clenched at the mere suggestion of something so official as moving in together.

“Hell if I know. I think you named it Wally. Anyway, I don't know, but it was really nice,” Jongin shrugged, thumb stroking along the younger's cheekbones. “I mean in a weird sort of way. But let's be honest, you would adopt a raccoon.”

“So where exactly does this factor into making you wake up horny?” Sehun laughed.

A moment passed over Jongin's face, one in which he looked down and the younger could see the detail of his delicate eyelashes against tanned skin. It was an embarrassed sort of look, one that he wasn't used to seeing. “I don't know. It was just nice and there was something about us being in that kind of setting. And then I woke up and you were still wrapped in my arms...and I don't know,” his voice trailed off.

The pit in Sehun's stomach continued, though it moved further into his chest as well at the idea that Jongin was turned on by something so sweet and domestic. “You're cute. Cheesy and dumb, but cute,” he offered, though the tone of his voice remained soft and honey-sweet. He'd expected some kind of joke, or some remark that would soften the words that came so close to being substantial.

Jongin wrinkled his nose, but kissed Sehun's neck. “I hate you. Give me a blowjob,” he said, voice half joking and halfway not, his usual arrogance returning a bit.

“Are you kidding me? After you put that gag on me? No, my jaw still hurts, you dumb shit,” Sehun complained, though seeing the pout that came across Jongin's lips, he knew that he couldn't simply deny him. Not that it meant he was going to sacrifice his stance, of course, so instead he let out a sigh and let his hand wander down between their bodies, fingertips gracing the base of the other's length. Seeing as they hadn't put their clothes on afterword, access was still simple and comfortable.

Jongin let out a quiet noise at the feeling, just a little sigh that meant he would be content with just Sehun's hand. The elder's hands trailed up to run through Sehun's hair, fingers running through the blond locks playfully.

Nimble fingers began to trail along the length, slowly working along the other's shaft. It didn't take particularly long for Jongin to reach his full hardness, his fingers clutching in Sehun's hair to attempt and urge him to continue on.

A slight smile came to Sehun's expression as he watched his lover. Jongin's eyes had fluttered closed, bottom lip caught lightly between his teeth. The younger's mind clouded with the intoxication of the other, of wanting to press soft kisses to his eyelids and over his sun-kissed cheekbones. It was enthralling, and he knew that he could watch him for hours if he was able to. But he knew that the other would get impatient if he explained that to him, so he accommodated the other and began to stroke his length with a bit more vigor.

Soft moans emitted from the back of Jongin's throat, and his hips lifted up into Sehun's hand to seek more friction. The hand that had been in Sehun's hair moved to thread through his own, fingers curling in his black locks to seemingly help deal with the sensations that filled him.

“You're so beautiful, baby,” the younger said softly, unable to hold back from saying something as he continued to stroke him. Precome pooled at the tip of his cock, and he made sure to swipe a finger through it to use it as a natural lubrication for his motions.

Instead of answering, however, Jongin merely let out another long moan, head tilting back and hitting the wall with a dull thud. He didn't seem to mind, however, and only lifted his hips a little more into the sensations.

It didn't take long before Sehun's hand was moving in a more erratic rhythm, trying to accommodate the other and give him as much pleasure as he could. He loved the way that Jongin's mouth turned a darker shade of pink with the mixture of arousal and the abuse of his teeth against such delicate skin. And the way that his adam's apple bobbed when he swallowed as the pleasure got to be too much.

It was with a loud cry of Sehun's name that Jongin came, his fingers clenching into his own hair and body seizing for a moment as the wave of pleasure came over him. The younger could only watch, gaze fixated on the other's expression that passed from pleasure to a sensation of calmness.

“Better?” Sehun asked playfully, rolling over to grab a tissue from the nightstand, wiping off his hand.

“Mm, much,” the elder sighed again, taking the offered tissue after a moment to clean off his stomach.

The younger's attention was caught, however, by his phone. Picking it up, he turned onto his back and read the message from Kris.

“What's up?” Jongin asked, though he only seemed to be asking out of habit more than genuine curiosity.

“It's Kris. He's asking what's been going on with me lately,” he shrugged a little before glancing to the side at the other.

Something passed over Jongin's expression, something akin to what was seen at the party. “Right. Speaking of, I meant to ask you...how was he? Things were kind of awkward when that happened,” he said with a hum.

An eyebrow raised slightly. “Why do you want to know?” Truthfully, he liked that Jongin still cared and that he seemed so bothered by Kris.

“Just curious, I guess.”

Sehun sighed softly. “Fine, but if I talk about Kris, you answer my questions,” he demanded with a look.

A momentary look of question, potentially hesitation even, passed over Jongin's face before he shrugged. “Sure, I guess. So?”

“Mm, it was good. I mean, I already admitted that I probably just did it to make you jealous. I guess it was just one of those things; I knew he liked me and he knew I wasn't in a great mood, so it just happened,” Sehun explained, though he wasn't sure that answered the other's questions exactly.

“That's the boring side of it,” Jongin laughed, “I mean, how was the actual fuck? Was his dick bigger than mine?”

“Oh my god, Jongin. Seriously?”

He had the decency to look at least mildly ashamed. “Well, I want to know.”

“I didn't fucking measure it, I don't know. Both are fine, both do the job. That's all there is to it,” Sehun attempted to hold back a laugh, but Jongin being so strange made it sort of impossible for him to deny.

“Lame. But okay. Is he kinky?”

“Ugh, you're so fucked up. I mean, I don't know. We only fucked once, after all,” he shook his head, “but probably? I don't know, he was rough, if that counts for anything.”

Jongin paused for a moment, humming in seeming consideration. His brow furrowed slightly whenever he was thinking about things, his mouth pressed together and this sort of vacant look passed over his gaze. “Okay, I'm satisfied for now,” he finally decided with his signature smirk, “now go ahead, what do you want to know?”

Sehun hesitated for a moment, wondering what he should ask. There had been a number of questions that had been pooling in the back of his mind for a while, after all. “You and Chanyeol. What's the deal?”

Another frown crossed over his face. “What do you mean? We're friends.”

“No, I mean. Like when we were all together...you two seemed awfully comfortable,” he reminded him, recalling the kiss that had passed between them. It was so familiar, and seemed as though it was something that had happened regularly.

“Ah, right,” realization finally washed over his face, “I mean, we've slept together a few times, sure. Mainly whenever we're drunk and neither of us found someone to go home with, but yeah.” Jongin shrugged, clearly not making much of it.

Sehun nodded once, mulling over the answer. “Okay, what about Luhan? Remember you lost your phone at his place?” he reminded, a brow lifting again in curiosity.

Jongin chuckled quietly. “Damn, you don't forget anything do you? Uh, he gave me a blowjob that night...I think. It's been a while, dude.”

“...so what about your ex?”

Surprise flashed over the other's expression. “Where did that come from? What about her?”

Truthfully, Sehun didn't know where it had come from. Only that he was ending up knowing too much about Jongin's life without him, and he wasn't sure where it left him. “Well, I don't know. Do you still have feelings for her?” This was a dangerous topic, he knew. There was a strong possibility that this would just bring back that conversation where he'd been rejected, but he couldn't seem to help himself.

A quiet hum left Jongin's lips. “That's a loaded question. I miss her sometimes, sure. I still care about her in ways. But breaking up was probably right for us, we were just too different,” he finally said.

The younger wasn't sure how to take such an answer. On the one hand, at least he hadn't said he was in love with her still, but he also hadn't rejected the idea of her.

However, just as he was about to open his mouth to speak again, there was a knock at the door. “I swear to god, you two. Stop fucking and open this goddamn door so I can get in my own room,” came the voice, irritated and exhausted sounding.

Jongin laughed, the sound loud in the empty room. “Hang on, Soo, you probably don't want to walk in here yet,” he answered. “Come on, let's at least get dressed or he's really going to kill us.”

Sehun let himself smile a little, still a bit on edge with the conversation that had been broken off. But he knew it would be something that could be picked up later, so he moved to go find his pants instead, only to be met with a slap on his ass.


	9. Intoxication

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: alcohol

Lips wandered over his neck, hot breath fanning over his neck and being met with quiet moans. Jongin's hands wandered over his torso, slipping under the thin material of his t-shirt and running over the overheated skin. Sehun's fingers ran through the other's hair, keeping him pulled close. His mind was swimming with the alcohol that was swimming through his bloodstream, everything feeling a little numb and strangely warm. He didn't know how they'd ended up this way again, as they always seemed to. One moment Sehun had been out with a few friends at the club and before he'd known it, Jongin had been there and hot kisses were being traded on the dance floor.

So they called a cab and left to go to Sehun's dorm, Joonmyun having been at the club still when they left. More kisses and heavy touches had been traded in the car's backseat, and they'd been anxious to get out and make it to the dorm room. And that was how Sehun had found himself pressed against the door, with Jongin's lips and fingers running over his skin.

He'd wanted to speak to him, to demand some kind of answer to their relationship and the status of what they might be, instead of conversations that were brushed away with kisses. But he could never seem to resist Jongin, and now was no different, his mind clouded only with thoughts of the other and needing more. “Baby, fuck me,” he demanded, words slurring slightly with the alcohol.

“So impatient,” Jongin let out a little laugh, but he wasn't exactly one to argue with such demands. And so he pulled Sehun away from the door, clumsily attempting to strip his clothes off. It took a few minutes for them to figure out how to actually remove the clothing, laughing a little at their own drunkenness.

But it was only another moment before Jongin pushed Sehun against the wall again, hands reaching to grab his hips and hook his legs around his hips. The younger clung to him rather desperately, not wanting to fall and not wanting to let him go. Jongin had consumed far less alcohol than he had, so he didn't struggle as much with the balance of it all.

Though he hadn't been paying much attention, it still came as a surprise when Jongin's length pressed against his opening, already slicked with spit. It was with a loud groan that he entered him, fingernails digging into Sehun's hips. Sehun clutched onto Jongin's shoulders, his head lolling back and hitting the door with a dull thud.

In his state, the feeling of Jongin filling him was one of strange tingling pleasure, that filled him in a way that left him wanting more and confused him all at the same time. “Harder,” he demanded, words still slurring a bit as he hooked his legs tighter, drawing him in further.

“You feel so good, baby,” Jongin whispered against his neck, shallowly thrusting into him, the angle of their position making it a little awkward, but neither of them bothered to correct it. Lips pressed little kisses against Sehun's jawline, sweat beginning to trickle down his temple.

Minutes passed as they moved together in a debauched dance that left Sehun a groaning, pleading mess and that made Jongin whimper lightly with the pleasure that overtook them. The position made it so that Sehun was getting contact to his length, Jongin's torso pressing against him and it wasn't long before he could feel himself climax, a loud cry of the other's name leaving his lips.

Jongin wasn't long after, pulling Sehun down onto his length more forcefully with little moans and grunts that eventually left him spilling into the other. It was with shaky hands that he let Sehun down, his hands releasing his legs to let him stand on his own.

Sehun's legs felt like jelly from all the sensations, and the moments that passed made him feel a bit less intoxicated, and the nauseated feeling from earlier that day returned again. “Ugh,” he groaned quietly, slipping away from Jongin and going to clean himself up quickly before flopping onto the bed.

“Are you okay?” Jongin asked, though he followed suit in wiping the release off of himself a moment later.

However, much to Sehun's dismay, he watched as the other began to reach for his clothing and began to slip them back on. “Where are you going?” he asked, ignoring the other's question.

“I was going to go meet someone,” he said with a dismissive shrug, not seeming to think anything of it.

“Who?” he asked, though his stomach sank at the words. Suddenly he felt dirty, as though everything that had just happened was wrong. He didn't feel all that intoxicated anymore, only disturbed.

“Does it matter?” he asked, offering a little smile. “Luhan.”

Though Sehun was a little bit glad that it wasn't his ex-girlfriend, he didn't feel all that much better knowing who he was going to see. “Jongin...I can't do this.” Suddenly everything he'd been feeling over the past weeks came rushing back.

There was a pause, and a frown came to Jongin's face. “Can't do what?” he asked, sitting down on the bed to finally give Sehun his attention.

Sehun's eyes stung, something that made him feel angry and weak at the sudden moment of wanting to cry. He knew that Jongin hadn't said anything at the moment, but it was just the simple fact that he was so oblivious to everything that had been happening. “This. Jongin...you keep blowing me off, you keep running away from us. I know we agreed not to worry about labels or anything like that, but...” he paused, still having a bit of trouble completely collecting his thoughts, “I can't. I have to have something more or nothing at all. I've loved you for so long...” he finally whispered, arms wrapping around himself. He hated to talk about it, to feel vulnerable and so open when he'd been trying to protect himself for so long.

Jongin was frozen, simply staring at Sehun for a long moment. “Where is this coming from?” he asked suddenly, his voice a bit quieter than it was.

“This is all we do. We fuck and you run off to other people, you won't ever say how you feel about me and you can't even commit to anything. I just...I'm nothing to you, and I can't handle it.”

“Baby...” he said, a hand reaching out to Sehun's shoulder.

He shrugged it off. “Don't. Either stay and make this mean something or go and don't look back,” the words were far more determined than he was actually feeling about the whole situation. All he could feel was fear. Fear that Jongin would leave him and that he'd be left in even a worse position than before.

There was another pause, and Jongin swallowed. “Sehun...you're my best friend. You know that, right?” he started before letting out a little sigh. “And I guess I just...I don't know. You've always been there whenever I needed someone. For sex or otherwise. And maybe I took that for granted.”

“What are you saying?” he asked, not wanting to play games with Jongin and listen to him ramble about things he was too tired to decipher.

“I'm saying that I don't know how to do this. I don't want to be out of your life, of course I don't. But I'm scared to commit to something again,” he said, “it's not that easy.”

“It's easy to fuck me...and other people, but you can't actually just commit to one person? I think that's answer enough,” he said, averting his gaze.

“No. Don't dismiss me like that. I'm saying...yeah, I have commitment issues. I don't know if I'm ready or if I'll be much good at it...but maybe we can try? I don't want to lose you,” he said, reaching again to brush Sehun's hair out of his eyes.

This time he allowed it, but let out a sigh. “Are you just saying that because you don't want to lose an easy piece of ass?” he asked, his tone blank and harsher than it would have been most of the time.

“I deserve that,” Jongin agreed, pulling his hand back, “But no. I really do like you, in every way. You're too important for me to let go. So please? Can we try? I won't run away from the commitment this time, I'll even tell people we're dating if that's what you want,” he added, attempting to make a joke out of the situation.

Sehun sighed. “I don't know if I believe you. We said we were going to try before, and you just ended up admitting that you've slept with all of your friends and that you aren't over your ex.”

Jongin moved, crawling to lay behind Sehun, arm wrapping around his waist. He leaned his chin on Sehun's shoulder. “I know. And I'm sorry about all of that. I just...really like sex, and I never know how to feel about relationships when they're over. I'd still probably say the same about my ex in 6th grade,” he said, a little chuckle coming from his lips.

Sehun rolled his eyes. “Don't think being cute is going to get you forgiveness. But alright, we'll try. Just don't leave me right now, and don't fuck up or I'm done.”

He kissed his shoulder softly. “That's fair. But I promise, I really only had to go see Luhan about getting his science notes. But I won't leave you,” he agreed, nuzzling him lightly.

Sehun felt a little silly at the words, but he tutted. “Oh, shut up,” he said, turning slightly toward him. He looked up at the other's gaze, meeting his chocolate brown eyes. “I love you. And it's okay if you don't love me right now, but I promise you will,” he assured before leaning up to peck his lips softly.


	10. Jewelry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: body piercing

__Sehun squeezed Jongin's hand tightly as he sat in the chair. “Is this going to hurt?” he asked, watching the man with tattoos adorning his body as he ripped open the needle's packaging.

“Not too bad. You'll be fine,” the man said, waving a hand at him dismissively.

Jongin laughed a little next to him. “You know you can always ask for your money back before it's too late,” he teased, running his thumb over Sehun's knuckles.

“Shut up. I'm doing it, but it doesn't mean I'm not a little nervous about it,” Sehun said, making a face as the man neared him with the clamp.

“Open up. I can't pierce your tongue if you keep shrinking away from me,” the man playfully opened and shut the clamp at him.

With another squeeze of Jongin's hand, he finally relented and opened his mouth, allowing the man to clamp onto his tongue. It wasn't necessarily his best idea, but when Jongin had mentioned that a tongue piercing would be hot in passing, he'd decided to go for it. It wasn't necessarily that it was just for Jongin, he had thought about it a couple of times in the past but had never gone through with it. So with the support of his boyfriend, he decided to jump in and go for it. The actual process only took a moment, with Sehun letting out a quiet pained groan in the back of his throat and squeezing onto Jongin's hand.

But once it was done, the tattooed man looked appreciatively at his handiwork. “Alright, here, I'll give you the instructions. But since you two seem...friendly,” he made one of those irritating eyebrow lifting motions, “Here's a casual reminder that there won't be any kissing for two weeks at least, and nothing more...intense for three to four. It all depends on your swelling. Don't touch it, don't smoke or do drugs, no alcohol, keep it clean. All that good stuff, here,” he said, reaching out for the packet of instructions and handed them to Sehun.

He made a face. “Thanks,” he said, not wanting to talk to much or complain about the fact that he wasn't exactly thrilled about not being able to do so many things for the next few weeks. It only took a few minutes for them to leave the place, Jongin leading him away.

“Hm, this should be interesting. I don't know what I'm going to do without being able to kiss you for two weeks,” he said with a little laugh.

Sehun rolled his eyes, “Shut up,” he uttered, though his speech was already sounding funny from the swelling.

-

A couple of weeks later, Sehun was perched on Jongin's lap, scribbling notes down in a notebook that Chanyeol was relating from his own. They were all preparing for a chemistry exam, and Sehun was already exhausted of the entire subject. He was thankful that it was likely to be the last science class he'd have to take for the rest of his degree, but it didn't make it much easier.

Jongin's arms squeezed lightly around his waist in a gesture of affection, gaze focused on his phone to add his information from what he could find on the internet browser. “Did we cover entropy?” he asked, confusion present in his voice.

Chanyeol let out a laugh that was too loud for the library. “Dude, yeah. Entropy and enthalpy and all the other annoying things that none of us are majoring in, but that for some godforsaken reason we now have to know,” he groaned. “Sehun you do know that there's such a thing as a chair, right?”

Sehun made a face at the other boy. “Jongin's more comfortable.”

“You'd better not be calling me fat,” his boyfriend spoke up, though the snort in his voice relayed that he didn't take it very seriously.

“Fat or no, can we focus?” Chanyeol complained.

“Rude. Why are you so freaked out anyway? You generally aren't the worrying type,” Jongin pointed out.

“Shut up. I don't know. I just...chemistry is definitely not my best subject, so can we please just get as much down as we possibly can?” he offered a wide smile, running a hand through his hair, messing it even further than it already was.

With a shrug, they agreed and continued with the session. Once Sehun had filled three pages with information that they deemed necessary for a study-guide, they went and made photocopies of it for themselves to all have the information to study from. There was a mix of information from Chanyeol's notes, Sehun's memory, and whatever Jongin had offered from the internet, all scribbled into tightly-packed sheets of notes that they prayed would be enough to get them a decent grade.

“What do you love-birds have planned for the evening?” Chanyeol asked as they walked away from the building, eyes already scanning the sheet in an attempt to retain the information.

Sehun and Jongin looked at one another for a moment. “I don't think we have plans, do we?” Sehun asked, not really recalling anything that they'd spoken about.

“Not officially, no. But it has been two weeks since you got your tongue piercing,” Jongin said, snaking an arm around his waist.

Chanyeol glanced up. “You got your tongue pierced?”

Sehun shrugged. “Uh, yeah. It was kind of a spur of the moment thing,” he confirmed, swatting Jongin lightly.

“Show him.” Jongin laughed.

Sehun rolled his eyes, but stuck out his tongue at the older boy, the metal ball apparent. “But don't get too excited, Jongin, it's still two more weeks before you get a blowjob,” he reminded him, voice quieting in the hope that Chanyeol wouldn't actually hear.

Unfortunately, Chanyeol seemed to have superb hearing. “That's hot. I dated a chick with a tongue piercing before. Can't complain, really,” he offered a shrug, “but wow, Jongin going two weeks without action. That's got to be a major feat.”

“Shut up. It definitely hasn't been fun, though. I reminded him that we could still fuck, but apparently he's enjoying torturing me,” Jongin sighed, pulling Sehun closer.

Sehun rolled his eyes. “Can you please stop telling everyone about our personal life?”

“He's hardly anyone. If memory serves, he was part of a threesome with us, remember?” Jongin teased, fingers lightly tickling Sehun's side.

Chanyeol laughed again. “Come on, Sehun, get used to it. I know everything about you two, one way or another. I'm gonna study, but let me know how it goes,” he said, waving a hand at them as he bounded off for his room as they entered the dorm building.

Sehun sighed. “You really need to stop telling him everything, this is getting embarrassing.”

“He's my best friend,” Jongin offered, leaning forward and lightly kissing the back of Sehun's neck. “Plus you're really fun to tease. Come on, Kyungsoo might be out of the room.”

“Reminder that you aren't getting any for at least two more weeks,” Sehun chimed, but let Jongin lead him toward his dorm room anyway.

“Why is that again?”

“For one, I don't want my tongue to get infected. And two, you're still trying to prove to me that you see me as more than a fuck,” he shrugged and watched as Jongin slid the key into his door and opened it.

“You're cruel,” he grumbled, though when his gaze fell on Kyungsoo at his desk, a frown came to his face. “Hey, Soo, can you be anywhere else?”

“Oh my god, Jongin,” Sehun smacked a hand to his head, unable to believe how rude his boyfriend could be. He knew that he was rather blatant and straight forward, but sometimes it still caught him off-guard when he would simply tell someone to go away.

Kyungsoo turned, eyes narrowed. “Fuck off, Jongin. I have assignments and this is my room too, so I'm not going anywhere this time,” he said, turning around again stubbornly.

“Oh come on, I haven't ran you off for a while,” he complained, though it was accompanied by a pointed look toward Sehun, apparent that he blamed him for such.

“Shh, come on, Jongin, let's leave Kyungsoo to his work,” he tugged on his sleeve.

“Your boyfriend has manners, maybe you should learn from him,” Kyungsoo spouted off as the two escaped from the room again.

Pulling Jongin down the hall toward his own room, he slid the key into the door and opened it, eyes scanning for sign of his roommate. “Come on, Joonmyun's not here right now,” he assured him and pulled him into the room. He flipped on the light and slid off his shoes and jacket. “But I don't know where he is, so he might just have gone to shower,” he said, making it a point to say so in order that Jongin wouldn't get any ideas. He didn't have any intention of budging on his position about not giving into him this time, he had something to prove.

Jongin hummed, “Alright, fine, I'll take the chance. Come here, I haven't even gotten to kiss you properly for weeks,” he complained, reaching out for Sehun's hand.

Sehun let out a quiet laugh, but took the other's hand and stepped closer. “Did you miss it?” he asked, leaning in to press a soft kiss to Jongin's mouth. For the past couple of weeks that had been all that he'd given the other, wanting to keep his piercing clean and he simply enjoyed the act of torturing Jongin a little bit.

“You have no idea,” Jongin uttered, letting go of Sehun's hand to wrap his arms around his waist and pull him flush against him. He sought out the younger's lips, pressing soft insistent kisses against him, lips kneading lightly against the other's.

He let out a quiet sound, hand moving to cup his boyfriend's cheek. After a moment of their mouths dancing together, he allowed himself to lightly run his tongue along the seam of Jongin's lips, light and teasing.

Jongin groaned quietly in the back of his throat, parting his lips and letting his tongue slip out to lightly graze Sehun's own. It was familiar, but in a way it was new again, the break from such physical intimacy making them focus for a while on the other aspects of one another that they enjoyed. But there was no doubt that they were physically compatible as well, and it wasn't long before Sehun curled his tongue around Jongin's, playful and exploring the new sensation of his piercing. He explored the other's mouth, running along his teeth lightly and pressing against him, the metal making an odd but pleasurable contrast with the wet heat of his mouth.

After a moment, Jongin parted and tugged Sehun over to his bed, laying down and pulling the other on top of him. A smile came to Sehun's face as he looked down at his lover, warmth apparent in his chocolate eyes. “You're beautiful, Jongin,” he said softly, pressing another light kiss to his lips before trailing along down his jaw and to his neck. Once again, he let his tongue slip out and run lightly across the dip in his neck near his collarbone, allowing the new sensation of his piercing to run over Jongin and allow him to get used to it.

Jongin softly uttered the other's name, going to run his fingers through his hair. He let out a soft little moan as Sehun began to lightly suck on his collarbone, allowing the sensations to simply sweep over him. His other hand went and trailed along Sehun's body, running down along his back and stopping only once it reached the swell of his ass, fingers digging lightly into the clothed flesh.

A chill ran down Sehun's spine at the feeling, moving to kiss along to Jongin's adam's apple, lightly sucking on the protruding skin there. Lightly he pressed his hips down against the other, a moan coming from both of them at the sudden movement.

The door suddenly opened, and the two froze in place. “Oh god...I'm...” Joonmyun's voice could be heard from the doorway.

Sehun let out a light laugh, warmth tinting his cheeks a light blush as he turned to look back at his roommate. “Sorry, Joonmyun, but it's okay. Jongin was just leaving,” he said.

Jongin groaned, “You have got to be kidding me,” he let out a sigh, finally releasing Sehun's ass.

“Uh, are you sure? I can...leave,” the older boy said, trying not to stare at them too much, the awkwardness he was feeling rather apparent on his face.

“No, it's really fine. See you tomorrow, Jongin?” Sehun said, an amused note clear in his tone as he moved to get off of the other's hips, taking a seat against his headboard.

Jongin groaned again and sat up. “I hate you both right now,” he said, shooting Joonmyun a glare before turning to Sehun. “I'll call you later,” he offered, though he cupped Sehun's cheek and drew him in for a last lingering kiss.

Joonmyun cleared his throat awkwardly and moved to go tidy up his desk, seemingly doing anything to avoid looking at or speaking to the couple on the other bed.

Sehun finally raised a hand to push Jongin away. “Okay, now go,” he said, though he let out a chuckle, knowing that he was making things even more difficult for him. “I mean, if you really want, you can stay and we can watch a movie, but you can't try anything.”

Jongin sighed, seemingly trying to decide which option was better. “Okay, fine. But if you don't mind, I'm going to take a cold shower and then I'll be back,” he said with another glare, slipping off the bed. “Thanks, cock-block,” he grumbled as he passed by Joonmyun.

When he was gone, Joonmyun turned to glance at Sehun. “Are you sure? I really can leave if you want me to,” he said.

Sometimes Sehun adored that Joonmyun was just too nice, that he didn't mind being sex-iled out of his own room even though he knew that it couldn't be very convenient. “No, really, it's fine. I'm trying really hard not to sleep with Jongin right now, so you being here probably stopped me from giving in,” he admitted.

Joonmyun made a face. “I won't ask,” he waved a hand dismissively, sitting down at his desk and opening his books.

Sehun sighed softly, grabbing his laptop to seek out a movie to find for he and Jongin to watch once the other got back, as he knew he would. Because even though Jongin was difficult to resist, he was a keeper of his word. And Sehun would keep Joonmyun around for as long as necessary just to avoid the fact that his boyfriend drove him crazy with desire.


	11. Knife Play

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: blood play, weapons, bdsm, control play

The next couple of weeks were filled with Jongin still attempting to put moves on Sehun, and Sehun struggling to keep pushing him away. There was no doubt that Sehun did want him and wanted more than the make out sessions that he always cut short. But he knew that he needed to make Jongin work for it a little bit, that for the past months he'd been making everything far too easy on him and simply gave into whatever desires he'd presented him with, so in a way he enjoyed making his boyfriend wait for it.

They found themselves in the coffee shop on campus, Sehun sipping a vanilla latte and Jongin tearing off bites of a chocolate muffin. “You know you can't avoid being alone with me forever,” he suddenly said.

Sehun snorted and took another drink of his coffee. “I'm not avoiding being alone with you, I'm trying to keep both of us in check,” he shrugged.

A frown came to Jongin's face. “But why? We're going out now, right? And it's been a month since you got your piercing. _A month_ ,” he emphasized, a whine apparent in his voice.

With a shake of his head, he mulled it over, pretending to be thinking about the issue. He already knew that he'd easily give in when he had no reason to object any longer, but he liked Jongin to be the one left guessing for once. “Okay, fine. You're right. Is Kyungsoo going away for the weekend or anything?” he asked, knowing that Joonmyun was currently in a state of panic over some exam he had on Monday.

Jongin shrugged. “I don't think he mentioned anything,” he wrinkled his nose. “But I'll just coerce him to leave us alone for at least a night? How about...Saturday?” he asked, reaching forward to let his fingers run lightly over Sehun's hand.

The younger smiled a little. “If you can get him to agree, it sounds good,” he confirmed.

“Though I do have a question,” Jongin said, pulling back and reaching into his pants pocket to withdraw a folded piece of paper. Opening it, he held it up to Sehun, displaying the alphabetical list of fetishes that he'd presented him with first weeks ago. “We're up to K.”

“Oh my god,” Sehun shook his head, snatching it out of the other's hand. He glanced around them quickly to ensure that someone wasn't eavesdropping, and skimmed down the list. Some things had been crossed off and others written in. “You really reached for some of these, didn't you?” he let out a little laugh, though he halted when he came to the letter K.

“Well, I figured I could make most things work. So yeah, that's what I was referring to. If you're not into that, we could probably figure out something else...but I thought it might be interesting,” Jongin explained, tearing off another bite.

Sehun shook his head. Knife Play was written in Jongin's scrawling handwriting. “Well...what exactly does this entail? Like are you going to be...slicing me or is it just a danger thing?” he asked, a bit unsure about the whole thing. Mostly, the ones they'd done had been fairly tame, but it was suddenly brought to a different level.

“Up to you,” Jongin shrugged. “Whatever you'd be comfortable with. I just figured that hey, the week after we'll be starting to get ready for finals and then we'll be back at home...so,” he continued, reaching forward and stealing Sehun's drink.

“True,” Sehun agreed. “Well...alright, we'll give it a go I guess. I trust you.” He hummed softly to himself, a bit distracted by the thought that he'd soon be away from the school and from Jongin for break. Their hometowns weren't very close since after Jongin had entered college his family had decided to move, so they wouldn't likely be able to see one another until the next semester began.

Jongin beamed at him, “Looking forward to it.”

-

As they'd decided, on Saturday night Jongin persuaded Kyungsoo to leave them alone, Sehun handed off a copy of his room key with the offer that he could stay in his room so he wouldn't be completely stranded for the evening. He figured it was the least he could do considering the way that they so frequently ended up shooing one of their roommates away.

He went with the other to the room to speak to Joonmyun for a moment about the setup. They entered the room to Joonmyun frowning at his textbooks. He only glanced up for a brief moment to see who was there.

“Joonmyun, hey, pay attention for a sec,” Sehun laughed a little.

Kyungsoo shook his head beside him.

Joonmyun glanced up, “What? What happened?” he asked, seeming a bit distracted, mind still on his studies.

Sehun snorted softly. “Nothing happened. But Kyungsoo is going to stay here for the night if that's okay?”

“Hm? Why? I mean, it's fine...but did something happen to his room?” his eyes wandered back to the page before him.

“No, I'm Jongin's roommate. They thought it would be nicer to stick us together than to just push us out of the room while they fuck,” Kyungsoo butted in.

“Ah, welcome then. After I finish this work, we'll order pizza and grovel about inconsiderate roommates,” Joonmyun said with another soft chuckle, “Go ahead Sehun.”

Sehun waved at the two and turned to go back down the hall to Jongin's room. He wasn't sure how well it would go, but he had faith that the two would be fine at least for the evening. When he got to the door, he used the key he'd been given and opened he door. However, he was met with a bit of confusion when the room was dark. “Jongin?” he asked, voice quiet.

The door shut behind him, and suddenly an arm wrapped around his waist. The feeling of something cold and sharp suddenly pressed against his throat and a shiver went down his spine. He swallowed, though fear rippled through him at the sensation that one wrong move could potentially end him.

“What are you feeling, Sehun?” came the whisper beside his ear, “Are you scared? But maybe just a little...excited?” Lips caressed the lobe of his ear, lightly sucking on the soft skin.

Sehun allowed himself a little smile. “Shouldn't we have a safe word or something?”

“Do you think we need one?” Jongin asked, pulling the knife away from Sehun's skin a bit.

“Just in case, maybe,” he offered. He didn't know if he'd be in a position where he would protest it all, but he did want a certain level of security.

“Mm...how about Wally the raccoon?” Jongin offered with a little laugh, releasing Sehun only to urge him into turning around, lips immediately finding his in the darkness.

“That's about the least sexy thing you could have said,” Sehun teased, but in a way he was actually a bit touched by the reminder of Jongin's odd dream. Sure, that particular conversation hadn’t ended particularly well, but he had faith that things had improved and that they were actually together.

“Shut up,” Jongin said, bringing the knife up again, lightly touching the tip to Sehun's cheek. “What are you thinking about?” he asked, eyes boring into Sehun.

He swallowed again. “I'm thinking I'm really...confused right now. I don't know if I'm supposed to be scared or excited or what. I don't know if you're going to use that thing on me,” he said, though he was trying to be very careful not to move his face too much for fear that there might be a slip.

“Do what I say, and I might not have to use it,” Jongin lifted a brow slightly, playfully, but there was a certain strange look in his eye that Sehun didn't want to test. “Now strip,” he ordered.

A chill went down his spine at the words and the harsh sound of his voice, but he took a step back from the knife and began to unbutton the white shirt he was wearing. Nimble fingers undid the buttons and he let the material slide from his shoulders, the cool air of the room making little bumps rise on his milky skin. The shirt slipped onto the floor with a light sound, and fingers went to his pants.

“You're beautiful, baby,” Jongin complimented softly, though the knife in his hand created a strange contrast. A mix of sweetness and danger that made Sehun's knees feel weak.

Instead of answering, he went ahead and undid the slim grey jeans that clung to his hips, and the sound of his zipper seemed strangely loud in the silence of the room. It took only a few moments for him to run his fingers into the waistband of his pants and underwear, pulling them down over his legs. It felt strange to be so exposed to the other, when he was just standing there with all of his clothing on and a knife in hand. He stepped out of the pool of clothing at his feet, standing before Jongin exposed to the darkness. Hands moved to want to cover himself.

“On your knees,” Jongin said, voice still a bit raspy in the strange silence.

Nervousness fluttered in his stomach, but without a word, he knelt down and got down on the floor to do as he asked. A few steps later, Jongin was standing before him, and the knife came again just under Sehun's chin, poking him with an uncomfortable silent threat. Not needing to ask what he wanted, Sehun reached out to Jongin's pants, unbuttoning and unzipping him deftly.

Jongin let the knife drop from his face, allowing the other to slip his pants down past his hips. His gaze continued to watch over the other, closely eying him and what he was doing.

It only took a moment for Sehun to reach and withdraw Jongin's length from his underwear, pushing them down with his pants. Fingers curled around his cock, stroking lightly along the length to coerce him into hardness. There was a soft groan above him that let him know his movements were working, and it wasn't long before he pressed a soft kiss to the top.

“Hurry up,” Jongin uttered between clenched teeth.

Sehun suppressed the urge to smile, and instead slipped his tongue out to run along the other's length. He hadn't let Jongin feel the sensation of his piercing, so he made sure to press the piercing against the protruding vein along his length. A groan emitted from Jongin's lips, seemingly satisfied with the sensations. He moved to let his tongue swirl around the head of his cock, his pace achingly slow.

“Okay, okay, stop. It's been too long for this, I'm getting overly excited,” Jongin laughed suddenly, pushing Sehun away before he could go further. “Go lay on the bed, on your back,” he instructed, a little smile on his lips.

Sehun let out a laugh as well, “I take it that you like the piercing then?” he teased, but went and did as he was told, letting himself settle onto the bed. He watched as Jongin made the move to take off his clothing as well, shadows playing over his body and only the moonlight illuminating the soft muscles of his torso.

It was only another moment before the other joined him on the bed, knife still in hand. He settled himself between Sehun's legs, leaning down and pressing a quick kiss to his lips. “I've missed this,” he said quietly before lifting back up and pressing the knife lightly against his stomach. “Can I? I want to taste you,” he asked.

Sehun found it a bit amusing that Jongin was still bothering to ask even though it was all a part of the game they were playing, but he was thankful for it as well. He was a little bit afraid of the pain and the danger, but he trusted Jongin with anything. So instead, he simply offered a little nod.

Jongin pressed the knife into his skin and Sehun let out a sharp gasp at the stinging, burning sensation. It was strange, he had never really been one to be into pain, but there was something about the strange level of intimacy that was presented in letting Jongin hurt him. After a moment, they both watched as the crimson liquid bubbled up over the shallow wound. Jongin leaned down, tongue snaking out to lightly swipe over the wound.

Sehun let out a little sound, a mixture between pain at the stinging sensation and a strange sort of pleasure that settled over him. “Baby, please, I want you,” Sehun suddenly spoke, his voice breathy and higher than normal.

Jongin pulled away, red smeared lightly over his bottom lip, and without answering he moved to press a kiss to Sehun's mouth. It was hot and wet, and Sehun could taste his own blood on Jongin's tongue, something that sent another shiver of strange pleasure through him.

It was only a few moments later of shuffling and reaching for materials in the bedside drawer before Jongin was pushing inside of him. The sensation was familiar, but it was something that seemed far away as well. It took a while for Jongin to actually push fully inside of Sehun, the tightness making him let out a quiet stream of curses.

Tears welled in Sehun's eyes at the stinging pain, but it eased quickly when Jongin began to kiss him again to ease away the pain and distract him. His legs wrapped around Jongin's hips, pulling him in deeper, arms wrapping around his neck to keep him close. The wound still stung, and he knew that whenever they pulled away he would be stained with his own blood.

Jongin moved inside of him in a deliciously slow rhythm that left Sehun uttering soft moans and wanting to pull him in deeper. The older pressed soft kisses against his skin, peppering them along his neck and collarbones as he moved inside of him, fingers lightly trailed into Sehun's hair to tug gently.

The pace remained slow, but after a few moments Jongin began to thrust harder inside. It took only a little while before Sehun was trying to plea with him to speed up, but Jongin only lifted himself onto his elbow and pulled up the knife again, pressing the cold metal lightly into his chest, leaving another ruby trail in his wake. Another moan escaped Sehun at the sensations, his hand sliding between their bodies to wrap his fingers around his own length.

Jongin's lips pressed against the cut, sucking softly on the blood that trickled up over it. After another moment, he began to snap his hips into the other, and Sehun knew from his movements that he was seeking his own release as well.

A tight sensation in Sehun's stomach alerted him that he was close, but at the same time as he suddenly felt a wave of climactic pleasure, Jongin bit down harshly on the wound he'd created. A loud cry came from Sehun at the sudden juxtaposition of pleasure and pain, and his legs tightened around Jongin's hips as he rode out the feelings. It was only a moment later that Jongin's hips stuttered and he suddenly dug his nails into Sehun's skin, the knife falling onto the bed in a forgotten moment.

The moments after passed in sweaty silence, where they both attempted to catch their breath. “Oh my god,” Sehun uttered with a little laugh, “I'm bleeding.”

Jongin snorted. “I hadn't noticed,” he joked, but slipped out of him and pulled away to survey the damage that had been done. “Ooh...wow sorry, I think that one is deeper than it was intended. Hang on, let me get the first aid,” he made a face and slipped off of the bed to go retrieve the supplies.

Sehun looked down at his own torso, a little bit of disgust playing on his expression. “Oh, gross. I don't think biting me helped,” he offered, but his tone wasn't harsh as Jongin began to clean him up.

“Sorry about that, I got a little too excited,” he offered and leaned forward to press a sweet kiss to Sehun's lips.


	12. Leather

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: exhibitionism

Sehun glanced up from his textbook as he felt the table vibrate with a message, quickly skimming the text from Jongin that read, 'I know you have that test tomorrow...but I'm at the club with a surprise. Come join me?' A sigh quickly escaped his lips, earning a quizzical look from Tao who sat across from him. It wasn't that they even knew one another very well, only that they figured out they were both in the same lecture class and needed to study for the upcoming exam which boasted 10% of their grade.

“Sorry. Jongin wants me to go out with him tonight,” he explained. Though he didn't necessarily feel like he needed to explain himself to the other boy, he didn't want to be distracted without reason and he knew that they were all in the same circle of people who knew one another.

“Trust Jongin to want to have fun on a Thursday night. Can't it wait until the weekend?” Tao questioned, his eyes never actually lifting from the page he was skimming. He had a certain way about him that he always tended to pay attention to things, but still seemed incredibly aloof at the same time.

“I don't know. You know how he is,” he said, though truthfully he didn't know how well Tao and Jongin knew one another. But that was a subject he didn't want to broach too closely. 'Really? Now? Can't this wait until tomorrow?' he texted his boyfriend.

An answer came only another sentence into his notes. 'Come onnnn you can use a break. It'll only take like a half hour??' It was very Jongin-like to simply assume he wasn't causing a hassle with something like that.

“Sorry, Tao. I've got to-”

“Go, go,” the other boy cut him off with a wave of his hand, “But for my trouble of being seen with you, give me your notes.” There was a faint hint of a smile that spoke of him only teasing, something he didn't know Tao was capable of.

Sehun snorted softly. “Okay, sorry,” he repeated and slipped out of the library.

-

It took him a half hour just to get to the club Jongin had directed him to. One of those trendy new ones that Sehun hated. He hadn't bothered to change out of his black jeans and t-shirt, and he felt as though he was dressed remarkably more casual than almost anyone else he passed entering or exiting the club. But he was in no mood to actually care, and he entered to a swarm of heat and overly-perfumed bodies. With a scan of the club, he couldn't detect Jongin, so he simply went over to the bar and ordered a drink, texting his boyfriend where he was waiting.

It was at least twenty minutes before he felt a hand slip onto his hip. He jumped slightly, and quickly turned to see the smiling face of Jongin. “Jesus, who does that?” he griped. It wouldn't be the first time someone had groped him uninvited, but he was relieved that it was Jongin this time.

“Oh, don't be such a brat,” he said with a laugh and pressed a quick kiss to Sehun's cheek.

He grumbled quietly, knowing that the other wouldn't hear it. “What did you want me here for?” he asked, glad that Jongin was close so that he didn't have to yell quite as much just to speak.

“Well, I was thinking about us. And the list,” he began, resting his chin on Sehun's shoulder.

Sehun rolled his eyes, “Oh god, not that list.” Of course, his complaining was more related to being dragged away from trying to study rather than a complaint about the list itself. His cuts from last time were still faint lines on his skin.

“Shut up. We're already up to L, you know.”

“And? What's it for? Lame? LSD? What?” he asked, voice still impatient, but he was beginning to warm up with Jongin's cologne and the feeling of his body pressed close.

“Turn around...” There was a smile evident in his voice.

Quickly draining the rest of his drink, he did as Jongin asked, eyes skimming over the other. He couldn't quite make out the details of his clothing given the darkness of the club, but when the lights dawned over his bottom half, his legs looked a bit shiny. “Wait...leather?” he asked with a frown.

Jongin allowed a faint half-smirk to fall to his lips, reaching for Sehun's hands and pulling them around to his own ass. “Mhm, what do you think?” he tilted his head slightly to the side, arms twining around Sehun's neck.

He didn't immediately answer, instead he allowed his hands to roam over Jongin's taut ass and slipped down his thighs. The leather was smooth, his touch roaming easily over his body. “It feels nice,” he relented, a slip of a smile betraying that he wasn't really annoyed anymore.

“Just nice?” Jongin asked, a playful pout coming to his full lips before he took hold of Sehun's hand again, this time slipping it around to his crotch. “How about now?”

A light laugh left Sehun's lips, but he couldn't help but accommodate him and allowed a hand to cup the other's smooth bulge through the leather. “Very nice,” he relented, squeezing softly.

A quiet gasp came from the movement, and it was only a moment later that Jongin slipped from Sehun's hands and pulled him further out and toward the dance floor. With the small amount of distance between them, Sehun could finally see the way that the leather hugged Jongin's thighs and ass so deliciously. The soft shine of leather accentuated the muscled physique the other had built over years of dancing and sports, and Sehun could suddenly see exactly why people tended to like leather so much.

“Where are we going?” he asked, in an attempt to pull himself out of his admiration for the other's body, but he received no response until Jongin suddenly found a spot he deemed suitable. Hands wound around his waist, and Jongin pulled him in close, allowing his bulge to press against Sehun's ass. “You're ridiculous,” Sehun chided, but he couldn't deny that the feeling was titulating, feeling the other's length beginning to harden against his backside.

“You love me anyway,” Jongin whispered harshly into the other's ear, grinding into him with the music's rhythm.

Not bothering to contest something that was undeniably true, he instead rolled his hips back onto Jongin, enjoying the contrast of the smooth leather rubbing against the denim of his jeans. He knew that people could easily see them, but he also knew at a club like this that no one would even bother to look twice.

It didn't take long before he could feel Jongin's hardness at full capacity, and Sehun himself was already semi-erect. Slipping around, he let his fingers dig into Jongin's hair and pull him into a kiss. It was more of a wet meeting of tongues as they ground into each other rather than a proper kiss, but it was all he needed. His other hand slipped down and dug into his boyfriend's ass again, pulling him closer as they rubbed against each other.

Moans were felt more than heard, Jongin's hands tightening around Sehun's hips as they moved together. “This is going to be a mess,” Sehun whined, wanting to remind the other of the mess that had happened when they'd been in the janitor's closet.

“Shh,” Jongin whispered, though there was a catch in his breath as he did so.

After another song was over, they'd worked themselves into a sweaty mess and no longer did either of their hips match the beat of the music. “Jongin...” he uttered only a moment before his hips stuttered and a warmth filled his underwear. “Fuck,” he griped, releasing his hold on his boyfriend's ass, pulling away and allowing his hand to slip to Jongin's bulge.

“Hurry up,” Jongin growled harshly, hands moving to Sehun's shoulder and clutching onto him.

Sehun allowed a soft smile before pressing his lips against his boyfriend's neck, pressing soft kisses there, but he quickly began to stroke his hardness in hopes of getting him off soon. Thankfully, it didn't take long before Jongin moaned rather loudly as he released, something Sehun felt more than actually heard above the music.

“Still just nice?” Jongin asked, breathless and half-laughing.

“You're dumb. But okay, fine I liked them. I might have preferred to be somewhere not this public, but this wasn't so bad,” he relented.

With a shrug, he pressed a quick kiss to Sehun. “It seemed more fun than always being in our rooms,” he offered, and took the other's hand to begin leading him out of the club.

It wasn't worth pointing out that there had been a number of times they'd had encounters that were anywhere but private and far from usual, but it wasn't particularly worth pointing those things out to Jongin. When they emerged outside the club, Sehun sighed with the fresh cool air, glad to be away from the noise. “I mean you could have waited a day, but...” he pointed out.

There was a swat to his butt, “Shut up. I'd already squirmed in and these thighs were not coming back out,” he added with a smirk, leading Sehun to his car.

“Whatever. If I fail this test, I'm blaming you.”


	13. Mirrors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: some angst, mentioned krishun, exhibitionism, masochism (slight)

“Tomorrow is the last regular day of classes already...how weird is that?” Jongin mused as he slid another slice of pizza onto his plate.

Chanyeol shook his head beside him. “You are the _only_ one thinking that this semester has been quick. Because you take the easiest classes ever. But I'm so ready to be done,” he grinned, but it was weary around the edges.

“But that means finals are next week...fuck finals,” Sehun mumbled around a bite of cheese.

There was a murmur of agreement around the table, and they resumed eating in peace. At least until there was a sudden kick under the table that caused Sehun to jump. “What the hell?” he yelped at Chanyeol.

Instead of answering, however, the older boy had pasted a grin on his face and was looking at someone approaching their table. “Hey...you're Kris, right?” he asked in a way that said he knew the answer to that question all too well.

Sehun doubted the clench in his stomach had anything to do with the pizza, but he forced himself to turn to acknowledge the other student. Ever since the night he and Kris had fucked, he'd avoided answering his texts and didn't bother to think of him much. But clearly he wasn't able to completely avoid him. “Oh...hey, Kris,” he said, a bit quieter than usual.

Jongin's face was a carefully composed sort of blank, one that Sehun knew all too well from when he was trying not to let some sort of emotion peek through. But he didn't even bother with a greeting.

“Right,” he grunted his acknowledgment of Chanyeol before his gaze fell to Sehun. “Can we talk for a minute?”

It wasn't what he'd been expected, yet a part of him had also feared those exact words. He didn't know why he was so uncomfortable about everything, given that he'd told Kris about Jongin in the first place. But he shrugged, “Uh, sure, I guess,” and slid out of the booth.

A hand reached out to his briefly. “You sure?” Jongin asked, seeming a bit wary of the other.

Sehun offered just a quick nod before following the tall student out of the restaurant littered with college students. “Funny place to run into each other...” he mused, trying to sound more casual than he felt. They stopped around the building, leaning against the brick wall.

“It's not exactly the biggest town,” Kris pointed out. “Which leads me to this: why have you been avoiding me?”

It had always been in the other's nature to be very straight-forward, he cut right through any and all small talk and simply said what was on his mind. Sehun had once admired that, but in the moment it caught him off guard. “What do you mean?” He reverted back to his habit of playing dumb when he didn't know what to say.

“Come on, Sehun. You never responded to what must be a dozen messages by now, and I'm pretty sure I saw you duck into a bathroom to avoid me. What gives?” Kris crossed his arms over his chest, his natural expression seeming annoyed and the body language didn't seem to soften the message.

“Oh, um...” he couldn't really deny that he hadn't answered him, but he didn't want to actually cop to literally running away to a bathroom (even though he had). “I've just...been busy,” he finished lamely.

Kris snorted. “Okay, if you're going to try that lame excuse then I guess we're done here,” he shrugged a shoulder and pushed himself off the wall.

“Wait. No, I'm sorry. You're right,” Sehun relented. He didn't feel as though he had anything to prove to Kris, not exactly, but he also didn't want to leave things as they currently felt. There was a static in the air between them that he hated.

While he didn't speak, he at least stopped, seemingly waiting on Sehun to say something.

With a quiet sigh, Sehun looked down at his shoes. “Okay, fine. I'm sorry I've been avoiding you. Jongin and I...we're uh, together. And it was just...weird?” he offered, feeling more lame than usual.

“Sehun...” now it was Kris' turn to sigh, “I thought we were at least better friends than that. Is it that we fucked? Is that what makes this so weird for you?”

“Well, duh.”

Kris snorted softly. “But it's not that weird. You slept with Jongin when you two were just friends, right? And it's fine if that's all you wanted me for, just let me know so I don't feel even more lame than I do right now,” he said, finally turning slightly to look back at Sehun, a faint rare smile hinting on his lips.

Even though Kris was being so nice, and maybe because of it, Sehun felt suddenly tiny. As though he was nothing and he didn't deserve a second of how easy-going the other could be. But there seemed to be hurt there, too, and Sehun had no idea that he'd ever meant anything like that to him. “No...don't feel that way. I guess I didn't think you'd care? Wait, that sounds like I think you're an asshole. I don't, I just figured that it was simply convenient for the both of us and that was it?”

“I see. You were the one who asked me to meet you that day so that you could get through your problems, you wanted to spill out the whole sordid relationship at that party. You can claim it was convenience, if that makes you feel better, but you sought me out.”

Sehun paused, knowing that the other's words rang true, and a wave of guilt settled over him. He and Kris had once been on the verge of something beyond simple friends, and he'd enjoyed seeing him once again. “That's fair...I don't really know what you want me to say here. I shouldn't have ignored you, I guess, but I didn't know...well, anything.”

With a shake of his head, Kris finally turned to face Sehun, a brow raised slightly. “Don't think about it too much. Let's just forget about this, okay? I'm graduating this semester, so I won't see you after next week anyway.”

“Oh...” he breathed. A part of him wanted to say something more, but congratulations didn't seem right. Saying that he was happy for him didn't fit the mood. Saying that he'd miss him seemed too intimate.

“Yeah. Oh. Well, I guess I just couldn't resist making you uncomfortable one last time,” Kris said with a hint of a laugh in his voice, reaching out and pulling Sehun for a hug.

There was something soothing about the hug, the familiar scent of Kris enveloping him and the warmth of his body leaning against his own. His arms wrapped around protectively, and Sehun easily wrapped his arms around Kris' waist. However, it was only a split second later that there was the sound of someone clearing their throat behind them. Slipping away, Sehun glanced to see Jongin and Chanyeol standing around the corner. Chanyeol had his usual pleasantly amused expression, but Jongin looked a bit peeved. “Kris is graduating,” he offered lamely, feeling as though he needed justify why he was embracing the other.

“Oh, hey, that's great!” Chanyeol said, voice a little too loud.

“Yeah...well, I needed to get going,” Kris shrugged, hand reaching out to pat Sehun's shoulder as he slipped by them all.

Sehun watched him as he drifted off into the parking lot and disappeared into one of the cars, and he wondered briefly if he would ever actually see him again or if that would be the last time. It made him almost sad, even if a moment before he'd felt more uncomfortable than he ever had. “Um, did you guys pay already?” he asked, not wanting to actually talk about Kris.

-

By the time they all got back to their dorms, Jongin still hadn't said but a few words and Sehun was still trying to talk about anything with Chanyeol. Which proved somewhat difficult given that he and the other didn't have a lot in common. But the tall boy left them as they passed his dorm with a wave, and Jongin and Sehun were left alone.

“What's wrong?” Sehun finally asked, unable to bear the silence between them.

Jongin sighed beside him. “Nothing.”

“You haven't said a word to me. Are you mad that I hugged Kris? Because that wasn't a big deal, it didn't mean anything,” he attempted to diffuse a situation that might arise from the hug.

His boyfriend turned, eyes narrowed. “Didn't mean anything? How would you feel if I was suddenly hugging my ex? You didn't even like that I _talked_ to her still. And yet you're saying that hugging some guy you ran to when we weren't together as nothing?” he scoffed, “Don't give me that.”

Sehun's gaze lowered down toward the dark grass where they stood. He knew that the other was at least partially right, he was jealous anytime Jongin talked to anyone he'd admitted to sleeping with. And then he hadn't even thought about hugging Kris right in front of him. If it had been Jongin hugging his ex he would have been gutted. “You're right. I'm sorry,” he said softly, arms crossing over his stomach. It seemed as though he was apologizing a lot for one evening.

“Whatever, it's fine,” Jongin shook his head, jaw clenching slightly.

“It's not fine. I'm not sorry for hugging him, I probably won't even see him ever again. But I get that it isn't okay for me to have different expectations of you,” he explained, his voice softer than he wanted it to be in the moment.

There was a partially hidden eye roll. “I doubt that. What did he have to say to you before that?”

Sehun frowned slightly. “He didn't know why I was avoiding him.”

“And? Why were you?”

A dumbfounded feeling swept over him for a moment. “What? Because of you.”

“I don't believe that either. I think that you had stronger feelings for him than you wanted to let on, so you just didn't want to see him so you could pretend like you're more innocent about all of this than I am,” Jongin accused.

He felt his jaw go slack, confusion and surprise settling on him. “Where is any of this coming from? That's not how it is,” he mumbled, but then he felt a sudden spike of anger at the accusation. “And where the hell do you get off accusing me of something like that? When you're a goddamn whore. You've fucked every single friend you have and probably half the campus.”

There was a silence, a look of anger and hurt combining in Jongin's expression. It had been something used against him before, but Sehun had never brought up his amount of partners until then. “Fine. If that's all you think of me, then I'll see you later. Maybe,” Jongin turned to walk away, arms folding over himself.

“Jongin...come on, I'm sorry,” Sehun called out, knowing that he shouldn't have gone that far. He didn't think that he was completely in the wrong with feeling wronged by Jongin's accusations, but he knew he shouldn't have called him a whore.

But the other didn't turn around, and Sehun remained watching until his form disappeared somewhere beyond the dorms.

-

The weekend passed without a word from Jongin. Sehun texted him multiple times without a single response. He saw him once in the showers, and they'd made awkward eye contact until Jongin turned away to walk out. He didn't know what it all meant for them, if they were still together and just in a fight, or if that was it. The silence felt suffocating, and most of the time he spent attempting to study for his finals and grumbling to Joonmyun when the older boy wasn't involved in his study groups.

By Monday evening, Joonmyun seemed fed up with it. “Sehun...I say this with all the sensitivity in the world...but if you stay in here one more night I'm going to kill you,” he declared, pen still poised over his notebook.

“Well as long as you're being sensitive,” he snorted, but it was quickly followed by a sigh. “Okay, fine. I get it. I'll go,” he agreed, leaving his books behind as he slipped on a different shirt to leave the room. He'd finished one final that day, and he didn't have the next until Wednesday, so he could afford a little time. After promising Joonmyun that he wouldn't return for at least a few hours, he glanced dejectedly down the hall toward Jongin's room.

Mustering his courage, he walked down and knocked on the door, a grunt of answer coming from the room. Slipping the door open, his stomach in a knot, he was almost relieved to find that only Kyungsoo was in the room, drowned in papers. “What?” the other asked, not even bothering to look up.

“Uh, Jongin isn't here...” he said, stating the obvious.

Finally the other's gaze lifted, a brow quirked slightly. “Right, you two are fighting. They changed the date of the dance recital, so he's practicing,” Kyungsoo offered.

“Oh. Is he...okay?” he asked, feeling a bit awkward given that the only interaction he'd had with the other being when Jongin was kicking him out of their room.

A soft sigh escaped the other's lips. “Why don't you go check on him?”

“Right. Sorry,” Sehun may have been a little obtuse sometimes, but he could take a hint.

“Wait. Sorry, stress and all,” Kyungsoo waved a hand dismissively, “But really. He's...I haven't seen him this upset since his girlfriend. Go talk to him, she never did.” And that seemed to be all that he had to say given the way he resumed his work as soon as he finished speaking.

-

Sehun always loved to watch Jongin dance; there was something mesmerizing in his movements and the way that he felt music. It seemed above anyone else he'd ever known, seemed to be beyond everyone else and the world sort of melted away around him. Standing in the doorway, arms folded over his chest, he saw him dance through the routine, both the image of his backside and the mirrored reflection.

But a moment into it, Jongin slipped, stumbling just slightly on the floor. “Fuck,” he growled, and in the mirror Sehun could see the irritation settle over him. His jaw was clenched, his brow furrowed as he walked back over to his iPod to stop the music.

“Jongin...” Sehun announced his presence quietly, his voice a bit louder in the dance room than he anticipated.

The other glanced over, his features softening but still guarded. “Hey,” he greeted, voice a little breathless.

“Um, you looked good. When did they move the recital to?” he asked, not wanting to push too much in case Jongin completely shut him down.

“I fucked it up. I can't get it right,” Jongin shrugged, reaching for his water bottle and fiddling with the cap for a moment, “Wednesday.”

“You'll figure it out. You always do,” he said simply, remembering all the times that the other had doubted himself and then performed perfectly. It was his nature, but he was a perfectionist.

There was a faint smile as Jongin took a drink, his adam's apple bobbing. Wiping his mouth, he finally let his gaze settle on Sehun. “Will we figure it out?” he asked, a brow raising.

Sometimes Sehun didn't know what to expect from Jongin, and he certainly didn't think he was going to just approach the subject like that. But he let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding, and stepped away from the door frame and into the room. He could see himself approach Jongin in the mirror, but his eyes averted back to the other. “I hope so,” he admitted quietly, before knowing that he would have to be the first to break the tension. “I'm sorry. I shouldn't have hugged Kris like that, I wasn't thinking about how you'd feel seeing that. But mostly...I'm really sorry about what I called you,” he dared a look at Jongin. The other had one arm folded over his stomach, bottom lip worried between his teeth. “I never should have done that.”

A little nod let sweaty dark hair fall into his eyes. “Well...I shouldn't have gotten that upset. It scared me, I guess, realizing how much you effected me by doing something I otherwise wouldn't have even thought about. And it all just...made me see how vulnerable everything is. Like we can hurt each other in just a split second and it's just...scary,” his voice was quiet, the sounds bouncing a bit off of the room, but there was an innocence about him that reminded Sehun of a little boy.

“I'm scared too, Jongin,” he admitted, reaching out a hand for the other finally.

A prolonged silence followed, one in which Jongin stared at the outstretched hand, a contemplative look settling upon his face. After what felt like ages, but was likely under thirty seconds, he finally reached up and linked his fingers through Sehun's own, their skin tones contrasting in shades of moonlight and sunshine. “I missed you,” Jongin half-whispered, looking at Sehun from under his bangs.

“I love you,” Sehun countered, a faint playful smile coming to his lips as he took a step closer to Jongin, fingers squeezing lightly.

Finally, Jongin's lips curved into a smile. “You cheesy fuck,” he grumbled, but there was no malice behind the words. “Do you think we need to set some ground rules or something for each other then? Because I know this isn't the end, it could never be the end.”

The words send a warmth spreading through him, and he hums softly in consideration. “Okay. I want us to both be able to feel comfortable talking to whoever we want. Whether that means Kris or your ex...it seems weird to say we can't talk to certain people,” he began.

Jongin nodded a little. “Yeah, I agree with that. But no hugging. And obviously anything beyond that is a definite no,” he allowed a soft chuckle to slip past his lips.

“Definitely. And...no broadcasting anything personal without each other's knowledge.”

“Are you still mad about the sex tape?”

“Maybe a little.”

“Fine. But we should still be able to tell our friends. And we can never call each other hurtful names again, okay?”

“I can't live without calling you an asshole.”

Jongin's other hand came to swipe him on the hip. “Shut up. Okay, let's amend that to we can't call each other names with the intention of hurting each other.”

“Fine.”

“And you still have to complete the list,” Jongin said, a full smile finally enveloping his expression.

Sehun was caught for a moment by the sheer beauty of his boyfriend, of the way his smile always made him feel weak in the knees and like his heart might stop. “I don't think I could object to that,” he admitted, though he would have rolled his eyes had Jongin not caught him off guard with his smile.

“Come here,” Jongin whispered softly, untangling his hand from Sehun's and reaching to cup his cheek, pulling him in. They paused a hair's breadth from one another, their breath mingling in the slight distance between them.

A slight smile twitched at Sehun's lips before he closed the distance, pressing his lips softly against Jongin's. The sensation was its usual familiarity, but there was so much that danced beneath the motion. Shivers ran down Sehun's spine, and a yearning for the other settled in his lower abdomen. Arms reached out and wrapped around Jongin's waist, pulling him flush against his body with needy clutches. The kisses quickly increased in fervor, lips and teeth and tongues colliding in a passionate embrace. Jongin's hand slid from his face down to his hips, walking him backward until Sehun's back was pressed against one of the mirrors.

A soft sigh left Jongin's parted lips before he traced lazy kisses along his boyfriend's jaw and down to his neck. Teeth nipped lightly at the tender flesh near his collarbone, and Sehun let out a soft groan at the feeling, encouraging Jongin to continue. A hot tongue swept over his collarbone, and Sehun's head tipped back against the mirror, arching into him. “I missed this...I missed you,” came the whisper, fingers going to thread through Jongin's dark, damp hair.

Though there was no response, Sehun could feel a smile on Jongin's lips against his skin. Fingers reached to begin undoing the buttons on his shirt, and it wasn't long before his skin was exposed to the air of the dance studio. “Jongin...we shouldn't be doing this here,” the thought suddenly occurred to him, though he also didn't want to stop for a second.

“Shh, no one's here. It's too late for anyone else to be practicing, so just relax,” Jongin assured him, offering a soft nip to Sehun's chest to quiet his worries.

And Sehun was always weak for Jongin, couldn't ever properly resist him for more than a moment. When Jongin pushed at his shirt, Sehun pushed away from the mirror enough to allow the material to slip to the floor. He reached for the hem of his boyfriend's grey tank, slipping it up and off of his form. Fingers traced the softly defined torso, and he could feel a shiver from Jongin as his fingers dipped playfully into the waistband of his sweatpants.

It wasn't long before Jongin had managed to slip Sehun's jeans down and step out of the remnants of his own clothes. Jongin trailed a hand along Sehun's thigh, feather-light touches leading up to cup his ass. Sehun let out a soft moan, his skin on fire from where the other touched him. “I need you,” Sehun said, voice coming out in a near-whine.

“Get down on the floor, look at the mirror,” Jongin requested, pressing another soft kiss to Sehun's lips.

There was a twitch in his cock at the words, always effected whenever the other would order him around. After a split-second hesitation, he did as he was asked and got onto all fours, gaze falling on himself in the mirror. A part of him was uncomfortable with his lithe form being so exposed, looking so needy and desperate as he waited for Jongin. But another part was excited, seeing the flush of arousal on his pale cheeks and the curve of his cock against his own stomach.

“Look at you. My beautiful little slut,” Jongin cooed playfully, dropping down behind Sehun onto his knees. Their eyes met in the mirror, and a smirk adorned Jongin's handsome face before he stuck two fingers to his lips, sliding them in slowly and back out in a suggestive motion.

“Fuck,” Sehun breathed as he watched him. His tongue swirled over the digits, putting on a show as he sucked and licked at his fingers for the benefit of the mirror. “Please, Jongin...”

His fingers slid out with a lewd pop that sounded much too loud for their surroundings. “Begging already? I love that,” he teased, but it wasn't long before his hand lowered.

Sehun inhaled sharply at the first press of wet fingers against the crack of his ass, and he couldn't help but press back immediately. Jongin's other hand came to steady his hip, amusement dancing in his expression. Looking at himself in the mirror, he knew he was a desperate, wanton mess, but all of his doubts faded as soon as he felt Jongin's finger slip inside of him. It started slow, a shallow thrusting that Sehun bucked up against as much as he could, before Jongin finally began to accommodate him and curled his finger inside. It was only a moment before he added the second digit, causing Sehun to moan too loudly in the studio. Arching into Jongin's fingers, wordless pleas slipped from his lips, wanting to say that he wanted so much more, that he needed to feel Jongin inside of him.

Thankfully, Jongin tended to have a similar impatience about him that evening, and he slipped his fingers out again, leaving Sehun feeling empty. But it didn't last long; Jongin spit into his palm and rubbed the saliva along his length, Sehun watching in the mirror. Jongin's dick was full and curved slightly in a way that managed to stroke his prostate perfectly. He yearned for his boyfriend's cock, and he could almost feel his mouth water at just the sight of him fondling himself.

But he was brought out of the moment when he felt the head of Jongin's length press against his opening. His fingers curled into fists on the hardwood floor, steadying himself as the other began to push inside of him. There wasn't enough lube, and Sehun's spine burned with the sensation, eyes slipping shut.

“Keep your eyes open,” Jongin grunted, reaching forward to pull on Sehun's hair until his gaze was again focused on the mirror.

A moan issued at the feeling, but he did as he was asked, letting his gaze fall on Jongin's form behind him, the effort to not move evident on his face in the way he bit his lip and fingers held fast. Sehun's own expression was a mixture of ecstasy and something he couldn't quite identify, but he suspected it may have been affection. After a moment he rolled his hips slightly, pushing back onto Jongin's cock. He wasn't fully ready, there was still a burning dull ache, but he wanted the pain.

Jongin snapped his hips, balls slapping against Sehun's backside with his thrust. A gasp emitted from Sehun's parted lips, but it wasn't long before soft moans were slipping from him as the other began to thrust inside of him. The pace was fast and harsh, Jongin's hips unwavering as they snapped inside of Sehun, their gazes locked in the mirror. Jongin still had a hold on his hair, and he pulled harshly as continued to thrust, arching Sehun's neck back toward him.

His eyes slipped shut for only the briefest of moments, but the sudden sensation of Jongin leaning forward, sweaty chest pressed against his back, caused him to quickly watch in the mirror again. Jongin's gaze fell on the two of them, his hips still moving inside the other, though a bit slower now. His hot tongue snaked out and licked along Sehun's shoulder blade, causing a moan to stutter from his lips.

“Do you like watching yourself, Sehun?” Jongin whispered, hips snapping in emphasis of the other's name. “Do you see how well you open yourself to me? The need in your eyes and the way your cock is already leaking for me...” he mused, finally releasing his hold on the other's hair.

Sehun could only clench his fists tighter, Jongin's words sending a thrill of further arousal through him. He'd always been susceptible to the other's habit of dirty talk, and now was no different. He ached from the relentless thrusts, but mostly he ached for Jongin more and more in a way he couldn't put words to.

But apparently something in his gaze satisfied Jongin, because he soon moved back to his position behind Sehun, hips speeding up in sharper motions that spoke volumes of how much they were both effecting each other. He arched into Jongin further, wanting to feel as much of him as he possibly could as he knelt into leaning his weight on one elbow, his other hand reaching down to stroke himself. Jongin had been right, there was already precum laden on the tip, and he moaned his boyfriend's name loudly as he began to feel himself.

He didn't realize that his eyes had slipped shut and away from the mirrored image until there was a sudden sharp smack against his ass cheek, a yelp of surprise coming from his lips. A glance in the mirror betrayed Jongin's smirk, amusement dancing in his arousal-blown gaze.

“Again, harder,” Sehun pleaded, seeing the pathetic desire in his own gaze, lips bright and red from licking them until they chapped. His fingers moved quicker along his length, Jongin's thrusts still brushing just shy of his sweet spot.

Wordlessly, Jongin pulled back and smacked his hand back to Sehun's ass, the slap resounding through the room.

But all at once, Jongin angled his hips a certain way, and Sehun saw stars dance behind his eyelids, the combinations of pleasures and the sharp sting against his skin bringing him to a climax of his boyfriend's name slipping from his lips in a whimper. He lost his balance, one hand still weakly pumping his cock, and he allowed his head to rest against his forearm. His gaze returned to the mirror, watching his well-spent and dazed expression for a moment before falling on Jongin as he thrusted inside his overly sensitive body.

Tanned skin was exposed to him, sweat falling in rivulets down his chest and over his toned torso, his jaw clenched in concentration and need, lips kiss-swollen and glistening. It wasn't but a moment later that his hips stuttered, and his expression tightened, teeth digging into his bottom lip as his tell-tale growl slipped from his lips.

The warmth fills Sehun, and he only uttered a weak groan at the sensation. A minute went by before either of them moved, and only then it's Jongin to carefully remove himself. Sehun didn't move, too worn out and enamored of Jongin to want to.

“You okay?” his boyfriend finally asked, voice raspy with use.

Sehun let out a weary smile. “I'm great.”

“By the way, Sehun?” Jongin said, reaching for the towel he'd had on hand earlier.

“I love you, too.”


	14. Narcotics

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: drug usage, mentions of previous infidelity

Finals commenced in their usual rush, with not enough sleep and too much stress falling on all of them. Sehun choked his way through his Wednesday exam, and that evening Jongin had his dance recital. The turnout was decent, some of the students wanted to get away from their studying, though mostly it was filled out by close friends of the dancers. Sehun and Chanyeol ended up sitting together in the front row, with Kyungsoo a few rows behind them still trying to glance through his notes when he hoped no one was looking.

When Jongin took the stage, he was breathtaking. His eyes were lined in dark kohl, and there was a dangerous intensity to his gaze that made Sehun shiver. He'd watched him dance through the steps just Monday, but there was always something different about Jongin when he was practicing and when he was performing. He transformed into something else entirely, and he was always captivated.

The routine went off without a hitch, though Sehun's gaze was focused solely on his boyfriend and he couldn't have said one way or another how any of the rest did. But judging by the applause that greeted the end of the performance, he suspected they were all talented. When all was said and done, Jongin swept Sehun into a hug, still sweaty and excited as he pulled him into a too-quick, too-rough kiss. Sehun couldn't help but laugh and congratulate him.

Chanyeol was busy chatting up a quiet boy Sehun recognized from the stage, and Jongin rolled his eyes when he noticed. “Yixing, if he's bothering you just tell him to fuck off,” he advised, though there was a grin written on his face.

“Fuck you,” Chanyeol flipped up his middle finger and Yixing looked shy for a moment.

They went out to grab some coffee afterword, Jongin and Sehun sliding into one side of the booth and Chanyeol and Yixing on the other side. Kyungsoo gave them all a look, but dutifully slid in next to Yixing, though his expression was immediately bored.

An hour later, and Chanyeol had successfully secured a date with the other dancer, to which Jongin rolled his eyes and whispered something about Yixing having bad taste. Kyungsoo had slipped away only twenty minutes after sitting down, excusing that he needed to get back to studying.

“Hey, break's coming up,” Chanyeol said suddenly.

Sehun lifted a brow. “Duh. And?”

“Shut up. What are you guys doing?”

Jongin and Sehun exchanged a look followed by a mutual shrug. “Going to chill at home, I think?” Sehun finally offered, “There's a couple of people I haven't caught up with in a while.”

“Ditto. Except the people in my case are my dogs,” Jongin quipped.

Sehun remembered that Jongin's memories and old friends were still in the town Sehun's family still lived, but that Jongin's family had moved far away from all of that. He felt a small, strange pang of guilt that Jongin couldn't see his high school friends as easily as he could. “You could come visit for a day or something, if you wanted,” Sehun suddenly offered.

A smile slipped to Jongin's face, “Not this time, but maybe. What about you, Yeol?”

They found out that Chanyeol was going to go on a vacation in Paris. Since his parents were always busy with work, it didn't make much sense for him to even bother going to his actual home. Yixing informed them that he would be staying over the break, but didn't feel like elaborating much more on the subject.

When they got back to the dorms, Jongin came in with Sehun and they made out on his bed for a while, until Joonmyun came back and told them to calm down with a soft laugh. Though Jongin had groaned, he didn't bother to push and simply curled up with Sehun as they drifted off to sleep.

The rest of finals week passed in a rush, with Sehun barely getting to see Jongin except for the occasional passing kiss and text updates about how their tests were going. The day they finished, Sehun had to leave quickly so he could beat the traffic, but he stopped by Jongin's room to pull him into a few kisses and promises of seeing each other in just over a week.

“Are you sure I can make it that long without you?” Jongin teased before he nibbled softly on Sehun's lip.

He let out a quiet groan. “Don't be lame. You'll be fine, it's only a week,” he reminded him, though that didn't stop him from licking into Jongin's mouth again.

They finally parted when Kyungsoo shot them both a piercing glare from his desk, a signal that clearly meant he'd had enough of them. With a laugh, Sehun promised Jongin again that he'd text him and parted ways with his boyfriend.

-

“You're dating _who_?” shrieked Baekhyun, hands bracing against the blankets in his disbelief. He and Sehun had been friends since middle school, one that began out of convenience since Baekhyun lived across the street, but it quickly evolved into a closeness that seemed strange to most onlookers.

Sehun snorted softly at the other's dramatic reaction, but he was used to it. “Jongin. Yes, the playboy. Yes, the jock. Yes, that Jongin,” he mumbled. They'd all known one another through high school, but Baekhyun and Jongin had never quite seemed to see eye to eye.

“You do realize he's a total asshole, right?” Baekhyun asked, shaking his head in almost-pity. “But I guess it makes sense, you two have only been fucking since sophomore year anyway.”

“It was junior year, shut up.”

“Oh, right. I forgot, sophomore year you two just gave each other blowjobs,” he rolled his eyes.

“Fuck you. He's changed since then, anyway,” he assured him, though as he took in the familiar and unchanging setting of Baekhyun's room, he almost wondered. It wasn't as though he doubted Jongin's words or actions toward him, but that he'd always been a bit too blinded by his adoration to ever see his flaws.

Baekhyun groaned. “Yeah, right. Remember when he broke that one girl's heart? He was dating her but then he ended up sleeping with her best friend at homecoming? Remember that?”

Sehun did. He'd been dragged along by Baekhyun in the first place despite his protests, and he'd watched as Jongin seemed to make his way throughout the room to flirt with anyone who would hold his attention. His date had watched too, and she'd slowly started to crumble every time he paid attention to someone else. It all ended when he'd disappeared and was later discovered with the girl's friend in the bathroom. His date had cried and ended up ruining her new dress. “That was wrong, I know. But come on, Baek, it was high school. We all did some fucked up shit back then. He isn't like that any more,” he shook off the memories.

“Okay, I'll just pretend to support this then if it makes you happy. But if it goes south, you better believe I'm going to say I told you so,” Baekhyun beamed at him, a condescending sort of smile that would make Sehun angry if it was anyone else.

“Shut the fuck up, let's get high,” he flicked his friend on the forehead. The only thing Baekhyun liked more than meddling in people's love lives was weed.

Twenty minutes later, he got an idea. Pulling out his phone, he texted Jongin. _'dude what's n'_

_'I haven't been 'dude' in weeks wtf'_

_'oh sorry I meant babe or something right'_

_'Are you drunk?'_

_'nah'_

_'high?'_

_'decidedly'_

_'ah. Why? You've never asked what one of the letters is before.'_

_'well I am now. Because if you don't have an idea or whatev I have an idea'_

_'hey that's new'_

_'shut the fuck up'_

_'n for new'_

_'fuck off'_

_'you texted me you shit. Sure, we can do whatever you'd like'_

_'cool'_

“Sehun I had a thought,” Baekhyun suddenly announced, leaning back against his headboard with eyes half closed.

“A momentous occasion. About what?”

Baekhyun tossed one of the many throw pillows in the general direction of Sehun's head, but it just ended up flying over the bed entirely. “You and Jongin. In high school, he had lots of girlfriends and stuff, right?”

“...true?” Sehun quipped, not completely sure where Baekhyun's mind was leading this conversation. He couldn't decide if he was too high or not quite high enough to follow along.

“Well I was thinking...you two slept together pretty regularly, right? Did he cheat on them with you?”

Sehun paused, not expecting that particular line of thought. “Oh. Um...” he licked his lips. With either answer, he knew that he was possibly going to hear an earful, so he sighed and settled on the truth. “Yeah, I guess so. It was pretty shitty, I know, but it happened. At the time I thought it was just because Jongin wasn't comfortable admitting he liked guys as well as girls. But then he came out senior year anyway, and it still happened.”

“That's mad fucked up, dude,” Baekhyun let out a little laugh.

“I know.”

“Is he cheating on you?”

Sehun sighed again. “No. I trust him, Baek. We had our...issues at first. But we both agreed to be with each other and that has to mean a lot. We feel the same way.”

“You two didn't...”

“Didn't what?” he narrowed his eyes.

“Say the...you know. The L word thing,” Baekhyun shuddered.

Sehun snorted softly. “We did. I mean, it's not the same like high school 'I love you,' I said it first. He knows I meant it. And he finally said it back to me, when he didn't even have to. I trust him, he won't do anything to hurt me on purpose.”

“I hope so.”

-

By the time break ended, Baekhyun had agreed to come visit one upcoming weekend and Sehun had garnered his fill of his family. He loved them, of course, but after being away from them he just couldn't handle being around them for too long at a time. Plus, he missed Jongin. They'd texted one another pretty much daily, along with the occasional photo and once they'd skyped for a half hour before Jongin fell asleep.

When Sehun got to his dorm room, he was not-so-surprised to see Joonmyun already there, re-tidying the side of his room that was already clean. “Welcome back,” he offered cheerfully over his shoulder as he stacked some papers together and tucked them into a drawer.

“Yo,” Sehun nodded his greeting, tossing his bag onto his bed before flopping down with it. “How was your break?”

“Hm, interesting I think. I landed an internship at one of the law offices downtown,” he shrugged.

“I thought you were headed home?” Sehun asked. Joonmyun came from a large city that required a two hour flight.

“I did. My dad knows the guy, they did some work together back when they were in college. So he made a call and that's that. Also, my girlfriend broke up with me.”

Sehun blinked, trying to process the layers of information that Joonmyun tended to throw at him all at once. “Okay, wait...I mean cool about the internship, that's convenient. But why did she break up with you?”

Joonmyun sighed quietly before giving a shrug. “She said that I'm too boring, that I'm more focused on my studies than her. She wants someone who can give her more. Or something like that, it's not that big of a deal.”

He knew that his roommate was lying a bit, that it bothered him more than he was letting on, but he tended to always gloss over whenever something happened. “That sucks, dude. Want to go out and get drunk? We can get you laid tonight if you want,” he offered, not having actually dealt with comforting his roommate before. Most of the time when Joonmyun was in a bad mood it was due to stress, not anything like this.

But his roommate just laughed softly, moving toward the bed to re-make it. “Thanks, but it's fine. We weren't really working out that well anyway. Kyungsoo and I are going to a new exhibit tonight, he texted me about it earlier.”

Sehun lifted a brow. “Didn't know you batted for the same team.”

A flush broke over Joonmyun's neck, tinting his ears where Sehun could see. “It's nothing like _that_ , we just found out we have some similar interests. Remember when you and Jongin forced us to room together?”

“Mhm, is that all you two did? Just...talked?” there was a teasing note in his voice, a playful sort of smile twitching at his lips.

Joonmyun turned to shoot him a glare. “Stop that.”

Sehun snorted, but let the subject drop. He filed it into the back of his mind to tease him about later, but as he texted Jongin about their plans later, it quickly slipped his mind.

-

As he slipped around people crowded around Luhan's kitchen, Sehun's gaze was focused solely on trying to find his boyfriend. There had been a delay in Jongin's flight getting back, so they weren't able to see one another beforehand and Jongin ended up just asking Sehun to meet him at the party Luhan was throwing as a pre-semester rendezvous.

After a minute, he caught sight of him standing near the backdoor, laughing with Chanyeol and Yixing. Sehun couldn't help the small smile that slipped onto his face at the sight of his boyfriend, and he sauntered over to him. Playfully, he slid his hands up and over Jongin's eyes, leaning into his ear to whisper a quiet “Guess who?”

“Sehun,” Jongin answered without even a second's hesitation. He turned so that he could face him, Sehun's hands resting now on the back of his neck. “I missed you,” he continued, leaning in to press a kiss to Sehun's lips.

A tingle ran up along his spine at the gesture, feeling like even that week was far too long to go without kissing Jongin. “I missed you too,” he said softly, kissing him a few more times.

Chanyeol cleared his throat behind them, coughing out a quiet, “Lame as fuck,” under his breath. Yixing laughed, but it made Jongin turn to face them again.

Sehun snorted, flipping Chanyeol off jokingly. “So, Jongin, did Kyungsoo say anything about this little date he has with Joonmyun?” he finally offered, changing the subject to something they could all talk about: gossiping about their friends' love lives.

Chanyeol raised his eyebrows. “Are those two dating? I didn't see that coming.”

Jongin shrugged. “Don't know for sure. Kyungsoo just said that he was glad to know someone with half a brain. Could be love. Nerd love.”

Sehun rolled his eyes. “What about you two? How did your date go?”

Yixing and Chanyeol exchanged a look. “We think we're better as friends,” Yixing finally offered.

“...What did you do?” Jongin immediately narrowed his eyes at Chanyeol.

“Nothing,” he raised his hands in surrender.

Sehun quirked a brow. “If you didn't do anything, then why doesn't Yixing like you?”

“Okay, _okay_. Maybe I sort of embarrassed him over and over again because I ended up knocking down a display at the restaurant and then when I said I wanted to kiss him, he said I was being too loud.”

They stared for a moment. Yixing coughed, “He practically screamed it to the entire place. It was mortifying.”

“You are a sad individual, Park Chanyeol,” Jongin shook his head sadly, which earned him a fist to his shoulder.

They passed a few hours that way, milling about the others and making conversations about their breaks and the upcoming semester. It was nice when there wasn't the heavy air of stress hanging over them, nice that they could have this little last hurrah before tests loomed and work was assigned. But a little after midnight, Sehun pulled Jongin away from where he'd been chatting with Luhan. “Come here, I have a surprise for you,” he said with a little smile.

Jongin raised a brow, curiosity making his eyes sparkle. “You don't usually have little surprises up your sleeve, I like it,” he mused.

“Shut up. Here,” Sehun held up a tiny bag that he withdrew from his pocket, two small pink pills cradled inside the plastic. “I got these from Baekhyun, I thought it might be fun.”

A moment passed where Jongin looked between the bag and Sehun, a look of misplacement on his face. “Okay, what the hell have you done with my boyfriend? Drugs? Really? That wasn't what I expected,” he laughed, “What are these?”

“Ecstasy. Baek said it takes like 40 minutes to kick in, so I figured we could take it here and then...” he trailed off, leaving it in the air. It wasn't something Sehun was normally interested in, he liked to smoke pot sometimes, but anything beyond that felt too unknown. But he liked the look of surprise on Jongin's face that he'd been the one to suggest it.

“I've never done it. Want to just do half?” Jongin suggested, plucking the bag from Sehun's hands and opening it. He stared for a brief moment before he pulled out one of the pills, marked with a star before he allowed a faint smile to pass his lips. He broke it in half, holding his hand out for Sehun to take one.

He plucked the half from Jongin's palm, placing it on his tongue before he swept in and pressed a kiss to Jongin, sliding his tongue into the other's mouth to push the pill to him.

Jongin let out a noise of surprise, but he cradled the pill with his tongue and swallowed. “Jesus, you _are_ full of surprises tonight,” he laughed.

Sehun smiled, plucking the other half of the pill and swallowing it. “Good, I like keeping you on your toes.”

-

A half hour later, Sehun suddenly felt as though he was flying and sinking all at the same time. His energy burned inside of him, and he could feel a smile slip onto his face much easier than before. A hand reached out for Jongin's, where he stood leaning against the kitchen counter. The simple touch sent a tingle through his skin. “Jongin...are you feeling it?” he almost whispered, looking around to see if anyone else noticed the way the world seemed to be a little tipsy.

Jongin laughed, “I think so. I kind of want to dance but I also kind of want to fuck you but then I also...wow, you look so pretty right now.”

Chanyeol appeared to Jongin's left, causing Sehun to jump a little. “You two are high as a fucking kite,” he mused, laughing his too-loud laugh.

The sound reverberated around Sehun's entire being. “Wow. Do that again, your laugh is so...magical,” he reached out a hand to Chanyeol's face, fingers pressing into his soft cheek. “So squishy...”

“Jongin...help,” Chanyeol glanced toward the other for support.

However, Jongin was just as gone. His eyes widened. “Chanyeol...your face is so...blurry...”

“Jesus Christ,” the tall boy muttered before stepping away from Sehun's prying fingers. “You two have fun, I don't want to deal with this.”

Sehun whined softly as Chanyeol's magical voice left them, but he quickly turned back to his boyfriend with a smile coming to his face. “Come on, we should go somewhere,” he said, their fingers still locked together.

“Where? Do you want to dance? I kind of want to dance still,” Jongin sucked his bottom lip into his mouth, seemingly contemplative.

Normally, Sehun had to be pulled to dance at a part like this, but he was flying. “Yeah, come on,” he agreed and pulled Jongin off the counter. They twisted their way into the living room, where a few other people were drunkenly moving together. Sehun laughed as he was pulled flush against Jongin's chest, chills and tingles running along his spine at the contact as they began to dance. “Everything feels so good.”

“I know...this is so weird, I think I'm already hard...” Jongin admitted with a shy laugh that was so unusual for him when they were in public.

Sehun snorted softly, but as he pressed his thigh between Jongin's legs, he could in fact feel a very distinct bulge pressing against him. Jongin let out a moan that seemed far too wanton given the light touch, but Sehun's cock twitched at the sound. “Kiss me,” he pleaded suddenly.

Jongin groaned again, but fingers reached to thread into Sehun's blond hair, fingers pulling at the tresses before he leaned in to press a soft kiss against him, seeming to test the sensation

It felt as though he was on fire wherever Jongin touched him; Sehun couldn't help the quiet sounds that slipped from his mouth. “So good...” he mumbled softly before he leaned in closer, pressing more insistent kisses against Jongin. His teeth grazed over the other's bottom lip lightly, relishing in the plump flesh before he sucked softly.

Jongin let out a whining sound, arms coming to wind around Sehun's neck. His tongue swept out to run over Sehun's lips, and once Sehun parted his lips, he allowed his tongue to sweep inside, exploring his mouth in a way that felt somehow new.

Sehun moaned softly into Jongin's mouth as their tongues brushed, his body burning with desire and a need that was almost crushing. There was a fire in his stomach as Jongin sucked softly on his tongue, one that signaled that he might come just from kissing his boyfriend. His hand trailed to run along Jongin's side, feeling the shiver that ran through his entire body.

The music was forgotten, and neither of them could bother to care that there were others around. All they knew was each other, and a burning need for one another and to explore all the sensations that swept over them like new. Their inhibitions were gone, where Sehun would normally shyly pull Jongin to a corner, he now didn't seem to care if anyone or everyone's eyes were upon them.

Pressing his thigh into Jongin's crotch again, Sehun almost smiled as he drew a long moan from the other. It was only a second later that Jongin was grinding down onto his thigh, hips rolling in little circles that kept him gasping into the kiss. Sehun's fingers held fast onto Jongin's waist, keeping him steady as they moved against one another, quiet sounds slipping into each other's mouths.

Letting his tongue curl around Jongin's, Sehun felt his boyfriend stiffen, a familiar broken growl emitting from his throat as he weakly kept grinding onto Sehun. “Did you just-”

“Shut up, oh my god,” Jongin's words were shaky, clinging to Sehun's shoulders. “I don't think I've ever came from a kiss, holy shit.”

Sehun tried to hold back a laugh, but a soft sound slipped from his mouth. “I think I'll take that as a compliment.”

A flush broke Jongin's cheeks, but the drugs kept him from feeling much shame one way or another. “That was kind of amazing, though. I want to keep dancing, but I have a mess in my pants...” he whined softly.

Sehun wasn't used to Jongin being the whiny, needy one after an orgasm, but he found that he liked it. Even if it was due mostly to the drugs they'd taken, he let a hand slip to cradle Jongin's cheek and press a soft, chaste kiss to his lips. “Well then, let's go dance in your dorm, then we don't have to worry about your pants,” he joked.

But Jongin only nodded a little, “Okay. Come on, I feel like everyone's still looking at us, it's been creeping me out.”

They slipped away from the party, holding hands and stopping in occasional amazement of something they saw. Once it was the color of a building, once it was a squirrel that ran across the campus. When they finally got to the dorms they were overwhelmed by the bright lights that seemed to be shining just on them and made them paranoid.

When they went to Jongin's dorm, they peeked around to make sure that no one was there. Once satisfied, Jongin immediately stripped his clothes off, making a face at the mess in his underwear. Sehun held out a hand, making him pause. “Hang on. You're so beautiful, let me just look at you,” he breathed out.

Jongin let out a laugh, but tossed his socks to the side, standing in nothing but his soiled underwear. “It's so hot in here,” he complained, but he said nothing to stop Sehun's roaming gaze.

Though he always found Jongin beautiful, there was something about the way the drugs changed his perspective that took his breath away. The tan skin that seemed to stretch for miles, the gentle muscles that lined and curved along his body, the way his hair was disheveled and falling into his big dark eyes. Sehun's chest clenched, taken aback by how much he absolutely adored the other boy. “You're so...perfect...”

Jongin laughed quietly, a hand coming to scratch the back of his neck. “Come on, let's do something.”

Sehun knew that he could easily admire Jongin forever, but he allowed himself to be lead to the center of the room where Jongin pulled him to dance. It was clumsy, they weren't refined and a couple of times they stumbled over one another. But none of it mattered. Everything felt amazing when it brushed over their skin, the cool air that slipped through the opened window sent shivers in their wake.

Once they could feel that they were starting to come down, Jongin pulled Sehun into his bed, breathing heavy. “This is...wild. Do you want to fuck?”

“Let's just do this,” Sehun shrugged, sliding on top of his boyfriend and catching his lips in a kiss. Although the pure amazement was starting to wane, every little sensation still set him on fire. Jongin's hands came to rest on Sehun's thighs, and as they parted to catch their breath he smiled up at him. Sehun could feel a flutter in his stomach that had nothing to do with the drugs, and he couldn't help the smile that spread to his lips as they simply stared at one another.


	15. Odaxelagnia - biting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: biting kink  
> note: bottom jongin

With the onset of new classes came the onset of new stresses, and Sehun quickly realized that he was going to have a hard time in his sociology class. He groaned to Joonmyun about it, to which the older boy offered a sympathetic smile and suggested joining some study groups.

“Ugh, you nerd. I'm gonna go see Jongin,” he flapped a hand dismissively at his roommate. With a knock on his boyfriend's door, he only waited a brief moment before opening it. He was surprised to see Luhan sitting on Jongin's bed, a notebook spread over his lap.

Mostly, he still just knew him as Jongin's friend, and he was aware that the two of them had a past together. Questions arose from having their past confirmed, but he didn't exactly have any business asking Luhan about it, and even less did he have much of a reason to suspect anything. But oftentimes, he was still uncomfortable with knowing the extent of Jongin's promiscuity, his self-consciousness rising to the surface.

Glancing up, the older boy offered a smile. “Oh, hi Sehun. Jongin went to grab food, he should be back soon.”

“Oh, okay, no problem. I'll wait here, I guess...are you and he studying together?” he asked, though he remembered that Luhan was a pre-med, and Jongin had practically no interest in science.

Luhan snorted softly. “Can you just imagine Jongin in my classes? 'I know the anatomy of a dick, bro, do I pass?'” he mocked, though there was clear amusement in his tone. “No, I was helping him with gift ideas because he's hopeless.”

Sehun allowed a faint smile to pass over his expression as he went to sit on Jongin's bed as well. “He is. Who is it for?”

“He didn't say yet,” Luhan shrugged, “I came over and suddenly he was starving and couldn't wait.”

“Sounds about right. Where's Kyungsoo?”

“No idea,” Luhan shrugged. “So...how are you and Jongin doing? You two seemed...good at my party.”

A warmth crept over the back of Sehun's neck at the mention of the party. And he reminded himself that he was nervous for no reason about the two. In the back of his mind he blamed Baekhyun for bringing his doubts to surface. “We're good. Really good, I think.”

Luhan opened his mouth to say something else, but their attention was drawn by the door opening. Jongin cocked a brow at the two of them from the doorway. “I could get used to coming back to two beautiful guys in my bed, just saying.”

Sehun rolled his eyes. “You're a pest.”

“Yeah, but you love me anyway,” Jongin teased, leaning down to kiss Sehun quickly before squeezing himself between them.

“There will be no making out while I'm sitting here, thank you,” Luhan chided, “Jongin where's your food?”

“...I ate it. Duh.”

“Jesus. You were only gone for like ten minutes.”

“I was hungry, shut up,” Jongin swatted the other on the shoulder. “Oh...wait, I forgot. Sehun, were you just here to chill or were you needing me?”

Sehun shook his head at the two of them. He didn't know Luhan that well, still, but he seemed alright. “Well, it crossed my mind to be lame and say that I always need you, but I'm not that corny...so I'm just here to chill.”

A smile broke over Jongin's lips at the words, and he leaned over to press another kiss to Sehun's cheek. “You're cute when you're cheesy,” he teased.

“Moving on...” Luhan said loudly, reminding them that he was still in the room.

Sehun apologized, and attempted to remain somewhat quiet while Jongin and Luhan discussed potential gifts for Jongin's mom. Apparently, her birthday was coming up within the next couple of weeks, and Jongin wanted to get her something nice for once instead of something off-the-cuff. Mostly Sehun just listened, given that he was pretty terrible with selecting gifts for other people as well, which he guessed was at least one of the reasons Jongin hadn't bothered to ask for his help.

Once they'd narrowed it down to a few options, Luhan ripped the page from his notebook and handed it to Jongin. “Here you go, you're now well equipped to get her something decent for once. Don't disappoint me,” he gave a fake sort of smile before slipping away.

“Where's Kyungsoo? I thought he was practically a hermit,” Sehun asked, glancing at the tidy bed.

Jongin shrugged. “I think he said something about a date? Not sure, he's kind of weird about divulging...well, anything.”

“Sad, I kept hoping he and Joonmyun would hook up.”

“Maybe they still will,” Jongin snorted softly.

“Oh hey, remember Baekhyun? From high school?” Sehun asked.

With a hum, Jongin shifted, going to lean against the headboard and opening his arms for Sehun to come join him. “Sort of. He was your friend, right? Hated me?”

Sehun slid between Jongin's legs, sitting so that his back was resting against Jongin's chest. He could feel every breath that the other took, could faintly feel his heartbeat if they were silent. “I wouldn't say 'hated.' Maybe really disliked...” he laughed softly, “Either way, he's going to come down next weekend.”

“Oh, cool. Does he know about us?”

“Yeah, I told him. He was a little worried about it at first, but it's not a big deal,” he shrugged.

“He was? Why? Because he hates me?” Jongin let out a quiet laugh.

Sehun smiled a little, more because he liked the feeling of Jongin's laugh against him. “A little bit. And he remembers you from high school, so he remembers some of the stuff you did...”

Arms circled around Sehun's waist, Jongin's chin coming to rest on his shoulder. “I wasn't _that_ bad in high school, was I?”

Sehun hummed softly. “Remember homecoming?”

Jongin groaned. “I swear that's going to haunt me forever. Of course I remember that, it never should have happened.”

“So you regret it?”

“Of course. Okay, I'll admit that I was a little stuck up my own ass-”

“'-a little?'”

“Shut up. Fine, I was an asshole.”

“When did you ever stop being one?” Sehun teased, but he turned his head and pressed a soft kiss to Jongin's temple.

His boyfriend pouted, “That was a cheap shot. Why did you stick by me even after I did that, anyway?”

“Because...I knew what kind of person you were. That even if you did something really fucked up, that you were still a really sweet guy underneath it. I wouldn't give up on someone just for being an ass, otherwise I'd have no friends,” he ruffled a hand through the other's hair.

“I didn't think you did anyway...” Jongin joked, his smile evident in the sound of his voice.

Sehun laughed softly. “You wouldn't cheat on me, would you?” he suddenly asked.

There was a fan of hot air against his neck that allowed gooseflesh to rise over Sehun's skin. “No. I never cheated on my ex...I wouldn't do that anymore. Do you trust me?”

A faint smile curved his lips, “Of course I do. I love you, remember?” he said softly, turning to brush his nose against Jongin's cheek.

“I know,” Jongin agreed, hand reaching to cup Sehun's cheek as he pressed their lips together softly.

Sehun sighed softly into the kiss, his fingers reaching to trail a teasing dance along his boyfriend's thigh.

“Mm...the next letter is O...have any guesses?” Jongin asked, smiling a little as they parted, though he remained close enough that they shared breath.

“Not something about orgasms I hope...” he grumbled.

Instead of answering him, Jongin breathed out a soft laugh before he began pressing kisses along Sehun's jaw and trailing down his neck. With a hum, Sehun tilted his head and relaxed into his boyfriend's touch. A hot tongue snaked out and licked at the soft juncture near his collarbone, a soft whine slipping from the back of his throat.

Sehun felt Jongin's lips part, soft sucking following that caused Sehun to dig his fingers into Jongin's jeans. Abruptly, there was a feeling of teeth pressing into his skin, and a sharp gasp escaped Sehun's mouth as his boyfriend bit down.

“What the fuck?” he hissed, smacking Jongin's thigh.

The swat surprised Jongin enough to make him release Sehun's skin with a wet pop, a soft laugh slipping from him a moment later. “Sorry. I could have warned you, but that wouldn't be as fun. Odaxelagnia is a biting fetish,” he explained with a slight shrug.

“You're an ass,” Sehun huffed, but they both knew that his anger wasn't all that genuine. “Biting fetish, though? I didn't know you were into that.”

Jongin pressed another soft kiss to Sehun's neck. “You seem to have forgotten that I was the one who also cut you up with a knife,” he reminded him, a smile evident in his voice.

Sehun let out a soft hum of acknowledgment. “Do you want to take the chance and do it now?”

“When have I ever said no to sex?” Jongin reminded him, hands slipping up to begin unbuttoning Sehun's white shirt.

He let out a soft snort of amusement before swatting the other's hands away and sliding away from his lap to stand. “I'm locking the door, do you and Kyungsoo have some kind of signal to get lost?”

Jongin shook his head, slipping out his phone. “I'll just tell him to get lost. He's gonna be pissed, but when isn't he?” he shrugged easily, typing out the message.

While Jongin typed his message to his roommate, Sehun quickly undid the remaining buttons and let his shirt slip to the floor. As he reached for his jeans, Jongin glanced up, clearly a bit taken by surprise at Sehun already stripping off his clothes. A slight smirk slipped onto his face, “Don't make me be the only one getting naked here.”

There was a quiet laugh from the bed, “I like when you get aggressive.” Despite his joking tone, he still got off of the bed and they both rushed to finish undressing. Jongin reached out, wrapping his hands around Sehun's hips and pulled him close, lips finding their way to his neck.

Sehun sighed softly at the feeling, tilting his head into Jongin to give him more room to explore. “Jongin? Can we try something a little different, though?”

Jongin nipped lightly at Sehun's collarbone. “More different than a biting kink?”

Sehun snorted quietly. “In some way. Let me fuck you.”

“You fuck me sometimes.”

“Not nearly as much as you fuck me. If I'm going to let you bite bruises into my skin, this is the least you can do,” he pointed out, though there was a hint of a smile written on his expression with the words.

Softly, Jongin snorted, but pressed a soft kiss to Sehun’s lips. “Okay,” he agreed easily. Releasing Sehun, he slipped over to his drawer and pulled out a small bottle and foil square, tossing them onto the bed in a gesture of too much familiarity. “How do you want it?” Jongin asked, arching a brow at him.

“On your back,” he said after a soft hum of consideration.

Jongin did as he was asked, sliding onto the bed and settling himself against his pillows. Reflexively, his knees raised and his legs spread open for Sehun.

Sehun took in the sight of tanned skin sprawled over the bed, and his cock twitched in anticipation. Climbing onto the bed, he settled himself between his boyfriend’s legs and reached for the bottle of lube. He squirted some of the cool liquid onto his fingers, spreading it around to warm it up a bit before his finger found its way between the cleft of Jongin’s ass. Teasingly, he traced the digit along his entrance, earning a quiet whine of impatience from the other.

At the insistence, Sehun smirked slightly, but allowed his finger to breach the other’s entrance, slowly working his way past the tight ring of muscle. “Relax,” he reminded him softly, leaning in to press a soft kiss against his boyfriend’s thigh.

Jongin took a long breath, legs spreading open a bit wider. As Sehun felt him begin to relax more, he slowly began thrusting his finger in and out of him, carefully watching his expression that wore a dazed sort of pleasure. It took another few minutes to work up to two fingers, followed by three in order to stretch him open.

But after enough teasing, Jongin groaned out a needy, “would you just fuck me already?” before pulling Sehun into a rough kiss, biting his bottom lip harshly to make his point.

“I see why you wanted to try out a biting kink,” Sehun joked, but he knew better than to drag it out any further, and lined himself up against Jongin’s ass after rolling on the condom and squirting a generous amount of lube onto his cock. Slowly, he began to push inside of him, earning a low moan from Jongin’s lips, and he waited until he bottomed out before stilling. “You okay?” he asked, hands reaching to slide along the other’s sides soothingly.

Jongin took a few breaths, not answering him for a few beats before he offered a small nod, arms winding around Sehun’s neck to bring him in closer. His lips graced his neck, softly pressing open-mouthed kisses along the column of his throat.

Sehun shuddered at both sensations of Jongin’s lips touching him and the tight heat surrounding his cock. He began to rock into him, setting up a slow rhythm that drew quiet moans from his lips. With a low whimper, Jongin softly bit down on the juncture of Sehun’s neck, legs winding around his hips to pull him in deeper.

The feeling of the bite sent a tingle running down his spine, and he couldn’t help but lean into the other’s mouth. He pulled his hips back, letting his length almost slip out of him before smoothly thrusting back in. Jongin let out muffled sounds against his skin, parting with a quiet gasp. “You feel so good,” he whispered harshly, thighs clenching around Sehun.

“Bite me again,” Sehun requested, voice breathy as his hips sped up inside of him. He could feel the smirk on Jongin’s lips rather than see it, before he kissed along his neck and settled on another soft patch of skin. The bite came more harshly than before, his teeth pulling against his skin in a way that he knew would bruise in the morning.

They moved together in an increasingly frenzied pace, Jongin biting all along Sehun’s skin and Sehun pounding into his boyfriend with increasing desperation. The room resounded with the sound of skin slapping against each other and muffled moans, with Sehun’s groaning punctuating each thrust.

As Sehun felt a coiling in his stomach, his hips began to get more erratic, and his desperate moans signalled that they were close. Jongin didn’t seem to be far behind, and as Sehun began to see sparks, he bit down harshly on another spot on Sehun’s neck. The pain shot through him, and sent him over the edge, coming with a loud cry of the other’s name.

Jongin was only moments behind, his hand reaching between them to stroke himself quickly. Finally releasing Sehun’s neck from his mouth, he let out a loud whine as his release spilled over his hand and onto his stomach.

Sehun took in a few shuddering breaths as he came down from his high, leaning in to press soft kisses against Jongin’s forehead and cheeks before he slowly removed himself from inside of him. Tying the condom, he tossed it into the garbage and reached for a dirty shirt that was laying on the ground, running it over the spilled come.

“Um...I think you’re bleeding,” Jongin suddenly said, a laugh playing in his voice before he reached to tilt Sehun’s head. “Oh my god...you’re going to have to wear some serious scarves…” he mumbled, both seeming pleased and guilty by that fact.

Snorting softly, he moved to lay down beside his boyfriend, pulling the covers over them both. “I don’t care, that was amazing.”

“I thought you’d be into being bitten,” he said with a lazy smile, snuggling in closer.

“Maybe just when it's you."

 

**Author's Note:**

> I've finally imported this from AFF, so here it is as it stands at the moment. On there it's listed as simply, "From A to Z." I will continuously update the tags with warnings, as well as warn you in each chapter.
> 
> [Twitter](http://twitter.com/kumjongin)


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